Hanging Out

Harper's Island - Season 1, Episode 10

Previously on Harper's Island: DEATH!

Shea talks to Madison, who creepily brats about the "game" in which the sheriff hid her for Abby to find. Madison says he promised her the prize of Richard coming back; I'd be curious to see how he explains that one away now. Shane shows Katherine's body to Henry, while the rest of the panicked wedding party discusses how and/or why the sheriff would punish them to get at Abby. Jimmy goes to gas up a boat so that everyone can finally flee. Henry shares the news of Katherine's death with everyone, and makes plans to swing by the clinic to get Cal, Chloe, and the sheriff before heading to the marina.

MEANWHILE, a state police plane makes its way to the island, ostensibly to arrest JD. The two cops blather on for a weirdly long time. Henry and Abby reach the clinic, where they're told by Cal and Chloe about the sheriff's disappearance. Henry promises to find him. Someone in a sheriff's uniform approaches the marina as the state police land, and shoots the two cops dead as they deplane. Oh, no! Now we'll never know more about that one cop and his fascination with what groups of animals are called!

MEANWHILE, the rest of the party hangs out in the woods for no reason. Abby wants to go find her father, directing everyone else to head for the boats. Henry decides to go with her, which makes Trish volunteer to come along, too. Shane and Jimmy reach the marina and spot the police boat, but not the two bodies floating in the water. Abby and company teleport over to the sheriff's house, where they find blueprints detailing the system of tunnels under the inn. Somehow this fills them with the panic to run for the marina, because Madison's testimony just didn't do the trick. I guess I can't blame them. Jimmy and Shane pull up to the gas pump, and find it has no power, so Shane jogs up the dock to the generator, finding the sheriff's missing oxygen tank on top. Rut roh.

MEANWHILE, the rest of the party has regrouped, and approaches the marina. Shane fiddles with the generator. You'd think the oxygen tank would give him pause. Suddenly, he spots the two dead cops floating in the water. That discovery is apparently no match for Jimmy's nagging, so he goes ahead and flips the generator switch, realizing that it's rigged to blow a second too late. He calls to Jimmy, but the entire marina goes up in a series of explosions. Shane runs clear, while Abby freaks out a hundred times harder than she has for all of the other murders (including her mother) combined. She doesn't have much time to process, however, because the person dressed in the sheriff's outfit starts firing on the group with a sniper rifle. Despite his deadly accuracy with arrows and harpoons, he now cannot hit the broad side of a barn. Henry is winged, but everyone makes it to the abandoned bar.

Abby yells at Shane for not warning Jimmy, despite knowing something was wrong. Why yes, this would be a perfect time to bring up the fact that Abby has been menaced and warned about the deaths on the island since Day One, and didn't feel the need to tell anyone. Thanks for noticing! Danny is still pinning his hopes on the state police, and Shane tells everyone about the cops' deaths. Things are looking pretty bleak for the sheriff, especially when Shane adds the evidence of the oxygen tank by the generator. Henry and Abby are still gung ho about innocent until proven guilty blah blah blah. I'm sure the audience is with them, because like the suspicion of JD, it's too simple. That said, the other characters can be forgiven for carping that there's plenty of evidence to at least assume for the time being that the sheriff can't be trusted. Cal takes Henry to the back to look at his wound.

MEANWHILE, Maggie is telling everyone that seven years ago, Wakefield pulled the same trick of blowing up the marina to keep people on the island. Shane adds that this time, the boats went with it. Blond Tool thinks they're all screwed, but Chloe remembers the sailboat that Cal has rented, which is docked far, far away from the marina. Cal says that everyone would fit on board, but getting to it safely is another matter. There's some squabbling about who would go pick the boat up to bring it to the marina. Chloe volunteers Shane, who's, like, "Um, no thanks." Someone approaches the door. Blond Tool tools that they should just shoot whoever it is. Dumbass. Luckily, everyone ignores him, because it turns out to be Nikki. You know, Nikki. That girl who's had about two minutes of screentime who runs the bar, and who discovered Kelly's body. Everyone wonders how she's out wandering without being in danger, and Maggie snarks that maybe the killer is just after the wedding party, not the locals. Shane retorts that Jimmy was local. Nobody mentions poor Kelly, the reverend, or Burnface McGee.

Nikki and Abby go back to the kitchen so Abby can tearfully tell her about Jimmy being on the boat when the marina went up. She cries that she never told Jimmy how she felt about him, because she always expected him to be there waiting for her. You'd think the never-ending string of murders might have spurred her to take some action. If it's any consolation, Jimmy knew how she felt. If it's any further consolation, I don't think he's dead. Abby also tells Nikki that everyone thinks her dad is behind the murders, but she can't believe it. Nikki reluctantly tells Abby that a lot happened while she was in LA, and that something in the sheriff "broke" while she was away.

MEANWHILE, out in the bar, Cal and Blond Tool ready themselves to make a break for the sailboat. Maggie's brain leaks out of the side of her head. I guess I shouldn't say things like that during a murder mystery show, because it may well be taken literally. No, I mean that Maggie decides that since the murderer didn't kill Nikki, then he must not be interested in killing locals, so she's decided to stroll on home. That's some of the weakest reasoning I've ever heard. She ignores me, and resolutely walks out. When she's not immediately cut down, Blond Tool thinks they should all follow her lead. I could use a break from his toolishness. Cal invites him to go whenever he'd like. Blond Tool pusses out.

MEANWHILE, Henry goes to console Shane about Jimmy's death, despite the bad blood between them. Shane says something typically assy, and for once, Henry doesn't jump down his throat, but genuinely inquires into why Shane is like this all the time. He wonders why Shane insults anyone who wasn't born on the island. Shane shrugs that while the locals are stuck there, Henry and his gang were stupid enough to volunteer to come back. He wonders why Henry would ever want to get married here. "Believe me, I'm having second thoughts," Henry cracks. That melts Shane's shell a little, and he smiles. He says that he's not leaving the island, even if it's been turned into a graveyard. Then he sucks down some scotch in honor of Jimmy.

MEANWHILE, Abby finally has time to actually ask Madison about her story. She wonders if the sheriff was physically OK, because she thought his leg was hurt pretty badly. Madison is typically unhelpful. Just when Abby gets to a pertinent question about whether Madison is sure it was Abby's dad who took her, Shea busts in all "Get away from her! Maddy's been through enough!" Yes, let's not get any information that might actually save the rest of your lives. By all means, let's spare Madison's feelings, and get even more people killed. Luckily, this fight is broken up when Madison announces that there's someone on the roof. Once again, the hotheads want to fire their guns madly, and cooler heads prevail. Perhaps this time, the hotheads had the right idea, because Maggie's body slams into the window, suspended by a noose. I hate to say it, but it kind of serves her right. Now, are Madison's pwecious feewings still top priority around here?

The guys head to the bar to concoct a distraction that will give Blond Tool and Cal a chance to escape to the sailboat. They mix up some Molotov cocktails. Abby somewhat hilariously shuts the blinds so that they don't have to stare at Maggie's body. Then they wait for dark. Darkness comes quickly, and we get an outside shot of the bar with Maggie still swinging around. Cal and Chloe confer in a corner. She worries for his safety, and apologizes for bringing him to this wedding. He wishes he didn't have to go, and gives her the ring to hold onto, because he wants to ask her something when he gets back. Talk about tempting Fate.

MEANWHILE, it's time to start tossing bombs. The Molotov cocktails explode into a hopefully distracting fire. Cal kisses Chloe, and upon seeing this, Blond Tool kisses Nikki. Seriously, what a tool. She's kind of a tool, too, so she's charmed. Cal and Blond Tool make a break for it. Cal idiotically dashes for the driver's side, forgetting that he's in America, even though he's been in America for God knows how long before this whole mess even started. This gives the murderer time to plug him with a (non-fatal) bullet. Though the plan is obviously botched, Blond Tool moves forward, shoving Cal into the car, and diving in after him as bullets continue to rain down on them. They manage to get away. As they speed off, Chloe wonders if one of them was hit, but nobody inside the bar can tell.

Blond Tool drives down the road for a bit, but gets concerned about Cal's wound, and takes him to the clinic over Cal's protestations. Back in the bar, Madison starts to catch the snap about where Richard is. As Cal promises to talk Blond Tool through the process of digging a bullet out, a police vehicle approaches the bar. Everyone inside quickly realizes that there's a body on the hood. Jeez, how do you drive around with a body on your hood without it falling off? That's some skill behind the wheel. The car comes to a stop, and Jimmy rolls off the hood onto the ground.

So of course, everyone comes pouring out of the bar, because they've learned nothing this past week. Abby feels for a pulse, and discovers that Jimmy is alive. Hey, it's about time I was right about something! They take Jimmy into the bar, and while I can understand the impulse, you'd think they'd wonder who's behind the wheel first. Oh, wait. It soon becomes apparent that the truck has driven off. It'd have been nice if they'd shown us that. Shane surmises that Jimmy had time to jump into the water before the marina blew up, and Danny finds Abby's room key taped to Jimmy's wrist. Trish interprets this as the sheriff wanting Abby to come to the room, and is offering Jimmy alive as a gesture of peace. Despite defending the sheriff up and down when Abby did it, now Henry declares that it's far too dangerous for Abby to do such a thing, offering everyone up to go with her. It'd be nice if he gave half the thought he gives his friend to his fiancee. Luckily, Abby's drama beacon goes off, and she declares that she's going alone. She struts off in much the same manner Maggie did, though she's got a gun and bit more of a sense of self-preservation.

She arrives at the inn, and finds the sheriff waiting in her old room. He asks if Jimmy arrived safely. Abby confirms this, and the sheriff reveals that he's made a deal with John Wakefield himself to keep Jimmy alive. Abby blabs the old party line about Wakefield being dead. Shut up and listen to what he has to say! She wonders why she should believe a word he says, and he tells her that her coming to the inn was part of a trap. He warns her to stay away from him.

MEANWHILE, Madison tells Trish that she lied about the sheriff kidnapping her. Creepy brat. I guess this time she has more of an excuse, because her "new friend" told her that Shea would disappear like Richard has if Madison didn't lie to Abby. The sheriff becomes more and more distraught, begging Abby to leave before she witnesses something horrible. She won't. She still doesn't buy that Wakefield is alive, and asks if she's Wakefield's daughter. The sheriff swears that she isn't. Abby finally notices the cord attached to the sheriff's hands and a walkie-talkie listening in nearby. The sheriff tells her it's too late for him, and wants her to go be with Jimmy. Abby tearfully asks if the sheriff traded his life for Jimmy's, and the sheriff begs her to kill Wakefield once and for all, as it's the only way to end the reign of terror. He manages to tell Abby that he loves her before he's pulled back through the window, ending up hanged, just as Maggie was. Abby runs outside, and is found by...Wakefield, who tells her she looks just like Valerie Harper. No, Abby looks just like Parker Posey.

Next week on Harper's Island: DEATH!

Overall Grade: B-