Philly of the Valley

Top Chef - Season 11, Episode 6

Previously on Top Chef: The chefs unwrapped ingredients and equipment, while the audience unwrapped mini-sized candy. Gail and Padma's moms dropped by to be adorable for a while. The chefs catered a Halloween party and caused the judges to scratch their heads over why a themed vegan menu seemed overly narrow. Yeah, it's a puzzler. Travis and Carlos managed to navigate the tricky challenge and walked away with the win. Nina almost popped when she got stuck on a team with the sexist, condescending Michael, but her mood improved when his lackluster arancini got him booted off the show. Thirteen chefs remain. Who will be eliminated tonight?

I've been skipping the Monday Morning Quarterback sessions, but they are fun to watch if you're interested in what the remaining contestants think of whoever just got eliminated. This has been a pretty convivial season so far, so these scenes have mostly been of the "Aw, that's a shame" variety, but hoo boy, not this time. Nina is openly relieved at Michael's ouster, while the rest of the chefs cannot raise a more complimentary sendoff than "So, we just lost our roommate... How about that?"

Quickfire Challenge. The chefs are driven out to a farm, so you know Carrie is in a good mood. There they meet guest judge John Besh, and he can never appear without someone making sure to mention how awesome his hair is, so let's get that out of the way now. I don't disagree, by the way; it's totally swoonworthy. Besh explains that for this week's Quickfire, the chefs are tasked with highlighting a specific ingredient. I always like the featured-ingredient type of challenge. It tends to lead to some creative choices, but without the final products getting too wacky. Today's star is the Creole tomato. I'd never heard of it before, so I did some cursory internet research. It seems to just be the name for a beefsteak grown in the Creole region, which is a bit of a letdown. I was hoping for something distinctive about it. The challenge time has been cut to twenty minutes, and we get an amusing Patty interview in which she guesses that eventually, the chefs will get about thirty seconds to craft some haute cuisine. I wouldn't be surprised to see something like a sixty-second challenge someday. Mark my words - it's coming.

The timer starts. Brian has the idea to do a kind of toad-in-the-hole, with the tomato standing in for bread. See what I mean about the creative choices? Nina works like mad to make sure her tomato watermelon soup is ice cold, which is difficult to achieve outside in the sun. She tops it with crispy zucchini blossoms, and the whole thing looks delicious. On the other end of the spectrum, Stephanie has zero ideas, Travis throws together a standard salad, tosses some strip loin on top, and calls it a day, while Patty's roasted tomatoes marinated in olive oil and cherry vinegar (with arugula and asparagus) is wilting fast. When time runs out, the latter three are called out as the least favorites. Joining Nina in the top three are Carlos' bright tomato/watermelon salad, and Louis' bold tomato seed bouillon. It's difficult to unseat the queen, though, and Nina wins the challenge and immunity. She's refreshingly realistic about her winning streak, cautioning herself against getting too confident, because it's a short walk to Losers' Table on this show.

Elimination Challenge. It's another highlight-the-ingredient challenge, but not quite as exciting this time. You see, there are bills to be paid around the Top Chef studio. Lots of them! And apparently, no amount of talking about how super-amazing the cars that takes the contestants to the store will cover those bills, so the product placement continues with the Philadelphia Cream Cheese challenge. I don't even understand why they need to advertise that much. I couldn't name another brand of cream cheese if I tried. They've pretty much got the market wrapped up. In any case, the chefs will be cooking for the judges, Besh, and all of Besh's executive chefs. Their dishes must incorporate and highlight the cream cheese, and their courses will be determined by a knife pull. The challenge winner will snag $10,000. Not bad! Oh, but there's one more thing. The cream cheese will be the only dairy product available to use, except for milk/cream. That doesn't sound like too punishing a parameter until you realize that means no butter, which is the life blood of any kitchen.

There is no shopping segment this week. The chefs just grab everything they can from the limited pantry at Besh's restaurant, so it's bedlam for a good thirty seconds or so. Travis hopes to stand out by cutting his vegetables in a certain direction. Oooooookay. Nina stuffs zucchini blossom with eggplant puree. Yum. Justin is combining duck and local mushrooms. Sara, wanting to break out of the middle of the pack, is cooking lamb. Unfortunately, her piping bag is clogged with - you guessed it - cream cheese, which slows her down. That means her meat doesn't have enough time to cook. The middle of the pack is suddenly looking pretty attractive, eh, Sara? Nicholas wants to make beignets, but without yeast, he settles on funnel cake instead. I'm expecting a certificate in the mail any day now, verifying that I am the only person in America that hates funnel cake. Time runs down, and the diners get settled.

Appetizers. Patty and Carlos have the most visually notable dishes. Hers is snapper crudo with cream cheese vinaigrette and shaved purple carrot and chili. His is poached beets and pickled purple carrots with peach, habanero, and cream cheese sauce. The judges like the creativity of Brian's summer squash and zucchini, with poached oyster and emulsified cream cheese, but find the oyster too salty. Sara's lamb is wildly inconsistent. Nina's eggplant is delicious.

Entrees. Fowl is the order of the day, as Bene, Carrie, and Justin all serve chicken (or duck). Bene's is stuffed with caramelized onions and tarragon cream cheese. Carrie has vinegar-braised chicken in cream sauce with chilled cucumber, which sounds good, until the judges complain that the meat is dry and the sauce is goopy. D'oh! Justin's duck breast is served with eggplant vinaigrette, chanterelle mushrooms, and corn puree. Yes, please. Only Travis serves meat (lamb), and like Sara's, the cooking consistency is all over the place. He's not saved by his raggedy cuts of vegetable.

Desserts. Louis serves graham crackers with blackberries and cream cheese mousse. Pretty! It's Shirley's dessert that steals my heart, though. She's got a cream cheese egg custard with macerated blueberries. I'd eat the ever-loving hell out of that. Stephanie has a cream cheese, peach, and cherry mousse and a short dough. The judges notice that her cream has broken, and wonder if she just ran out of time and had to throw something on the plate. Nicholas' funnel cake is a big hit.

At the end of the meal, the judges and executive chefs agree that overall, this was a pretty disappointing challenge. "They didn't seem particularly inspired," one of the judges complains.

James: "Yeah. How dare they not be particularly inspired...by cream cheese."

One of Besh's executive chefs grouses that the contestants should have done better, because "This is how you build your reputation. Cooking for other chefs." Oh, of course! Why even bring the stupid, unwashed public into the equation at all? You know what we should do? Just make restaurants a mutual admiration society where chefs execute their culinary artistic visions for other chefs. Then you'll never need to worry about those other stupid non-chef jerks coming in and trying to exchange money for good food and service. The nerve of those people.

Fret 'n sweat. The judges reiterate how personally let down they were by this challenge. Nina, Justin, and Nicholas did the best at each of their respective courses, and are called in to Judges' Table as the top three. They all had thoughtful, composed dishes, and when it comes to selecting the big money winner, Nina pulls it off yet again. She is dominating this season! She gets applause back in the Kitchen before sending Travis, Sara, and Bene in to face the judges' wrath. It's pretty obvious why the former two were selected; inconsistent cooking is probably the second biggest issue the judges bring up on this show, with underseasoning being the biggest no-no. Bene's vegetables tasted steamed, which... So? It's apparently a pretty bad error, because the king of the tomatoes takes the long walk home. Aw, that's a bummer. He seems like a perfectly nice guy, but I guess we're getting to the point of the season where the chefs need to start busting out the big guns to impress the judges, and Bene never really crept out of his comfort zone.

Overall Grade: B-