Oh, Henry

Harper's Island - Season 1, Episode 12

Previously on Harper's Island: DEATH!

Wakefield is now content to wander around the woods. As are Henry and Abby. As are Danny and Blond Tool. Blond Tool thinks they'll cover more ground if they split up. Danny is sensibly not thrilled with this plan, but allows himself to be swayed.

MEANWHILE, Trish wakes up in the car, but Jimmy is nowhere to be seen. He startles her by popping up at her window and announcing that he saw a ship. She asks him where, and he tells her he went walking on the bluffs about a quarter mile away. OK, so either Jimmy is the second killer or he's a red herring. If he's the killer, I don't see why he didn't murder Trish while she was sleeping, but that's his prerogative. On the other hand, if he's not a killer, it was incredibly stupid and callous of him to leave her sleeping and alone out in the open. Trish is naturally offended, and asks him if he just abandoned her. He ignores her, and fishes some flares out of the car to signal the ship. The promise of a rescue overrides the insult, and Trish follows Jimmy towards the bluffs.

MEANWHILE, Wakefield spots Danny tromping through the woods. He runs to attack with his spear, but Blond Tool pops out of the woods and shoots him in the head. Wakefield, apparently composed of the same material as the Terminators, is wounded but alive. Sure, who isn't able to shrug off a shotgun blast to the face? Abby and Henry hear the shot, and head in that direction. It becomes apparent that the whole split-up idea was bait to lure Wakefield out. Score one for Blond Tool. That one point is immediately taken away when he and Danny just stand there with their guns trained on the squirming Wakefield. Hello? Guys? This man has murdered all of your dearest friends, and has proven to be extremely slippery. I don't think law enforcement would punish you too harshly for finishing him off, especially after all the cops he's killed. Blond Tool offers the kill to Abby, but she's unable to take the shot. She bashes him unconscious, instead. I guess we're supposed to conclude that she's a Good Person Who Won't Sink To The Murderer's Level, but to me, it's reckless and almost criminally negligent.

The commercial break gives the characters enough time for someone to conclude that it might be wise to kill Wakefield. Blond Tool is all for it, but Danny says that it's not their job. No, it's the police force's job. Why don't we ask the sheriff to arrest him? How about that deputy in the cellblock? The two cops from the mainland? Deputy Burnface McGee? Again, we're supposed to think the characters who want Wakefield to presumably go to trial are noble, but honestly, they're just being dumb. Henry and Abby agree with Danny, so Blond Tool is outvoted, and must go along with the plan to tie Wakefield up and hold him until more police arrive. Wakefield is up and about now. I guess those shotgun shells were made of pudding.

MEANWHILE, Jimmy and Trish get to the bluffs, and the ship Jimmy claimed to have seen is nowhere. Trish walks up to the very edge of the cliff. Back in the woods, Wakefield is tied up with a couple of belts. Abby beats herself up for not following through on her father's explicit instructions to kill Wakefield. She doesn't beat herself up enough. Everyone teleports over to the police station, and steps past the deputy's corpse so that Henry can lock Wakefield in a cell. He then goes to collect Trish and Jimmy, while Abby volunteers to go get Shea and Madison. Henry suggests meeting back at the police station. Danny, once again the timid voice of reason, doesn't think that's the best idea, but backs down yet again when Henry assures him that Wakefield is safely locked away. He and Trish leave, and Blond Tool heads back to the cellblock over Danny's objections. Blond Tool tases Wakefield, which causes him more pain than the bullet to the face did.

MEANWHILE, Henry reaches the empty car at the tunnel entrance. Abby, Shea, and Madison get back to the police station without incident. Madison gets back to being a creepy brat. She's been out of practice, lately, so she goes for double duty by sneaking back to look at Wakefield. Henry arrives, and announces that he couldn't find Jimmy and Trish. Nobody's too panicked, as Wakefield hasn't had any opportunity to get over to that area, but Shea realizes that leaving Trish alone with Jimmy wasn't perhaps the best idea. She reports what she and Madison found in the sheriff's attic. Nobody has time to absorb this before Madison pops back in to tell Abby that Wakefield wants to talk to her.

Abby goes back to the cell, and she and Wakefield have a fairly cryptic conversation about his motives. She wonders why he's still killing if the objects of his revenge are dead, and he wonders if Valerie Harper really loved the sheriff. He never really answers the first question, and of course she's biased in the matter of the second. MEANWHILE, in the front room, the others are making a case for Jimmy being the second killer. He survived the marina explosion, Wakefield delivered him alive to the bar (where he miraculously survived the bloodbath), and he knows his way around head spades. Shea points out that Jimmy doesn't really have much of a connection with most of the victims, but Henry and Blond Tool think the whole thing may be an elaborate plan to punish Abby.

MEANWHILE, Wakefield and Abby blah about Valerie Harper giving up Wakefield's kid, but keeping Abby. If we're going to start getting around to motives here, it'd be great if they were lifted from something better than Scream 3. Just as Henry gets ready to go look for Trish and Jimmy, Jimmy bursts into the office. He reports that Trish slipped and fell at the bluffs. Suspicious eyes are all fixed on him, and Henry relieves him of his gun. Abby and Wakefield bicker about Valerie Harper's worth as a mother, and Abby asks how Wakefield even knows Valerie had his child. Wakefield responds that he found him. Crap, it's a "him"? There goes my Trish theory. The commotion from the outer office distracts Abby, and she rushes out to find Henry ready to attack. Everyone reaches a consensus in which Jimmy, Henry, Abby, and Blond Tool will go to help Trish, but if she's not there, Jimmy's in big trouble. They teleport over to the bluffs and start looking around.

MEANWHILE, Danny rustles up what grub he can for Shea, Madison, and himself. Madison is hungry enough to eat a cherry Pop-Tart (ew), but says that she also got some food when she was imprisoned in the tunnel. Shea asks if Wakefield fed her, and Madison says that no, somebody else brought them food. Shea's all "Whaaaaa?", and asks why Madison didn't think to mention that two people were keeping her captive. Seriously. I know she's a kid, but she's not four. So now Danny and Shea know there's an accomplice, much good it does everyone now. MEANWHILE, at the bluffs, there's no sign of Trish, and Henry and Blond Tool are ready to shoot Jimmy. Abby intercedes.

So after a few tense moments, Abby is making some progress on cooling down Henry and Blond Tool, and she's helped tremendously by Trish appearing at the top of the bluffs. Everyone rushes up to tend to her, and she admits she lost her footing and fell. She's all right though, and even better, she's discovered a boathouse with a radio inside. They all head there, and while Jimmy and Blond Tool try to reach the Coast Guard, Abby and Henry fill Trish in on their suspicions of Jimmy. Trish reiterates that her fall off the bluffs was an accident. The Coast Guard responds to the distress call, and Trish reports on Wakefield's killing spree and capture. The Coast Guard says that some bad weather on their end may hold up rescue crews, but it shouldn't be more than four hours. Everyone's relieved. Blond Tool says he'll stay with the radio, while Henry and Trish head back to the inn to get her some dry clothes. Abby and Jimmy will go back to the station to let the others know what has happened. Jimmy's still not entirely free of suspicion, but Abby's all gooey for him, so she's content to stick with him.

Back at the inn, Trish takes a hot shower, then goes to get dressed. When Henry returns with everyone's luggage, he finds her wearing her wedding dress. They smooch. MEANWHILE, back at the station, Danny chats with Madison about Wakefield, who's busy wriggling out of his oh-so-well-constructed belt bonds. MEANWHILE, in the woods, Jimmy admits to Abby that he got in some fights when she left, and was unfortunately in the vicinity when someone got killed in Seattle, but he was never considered a real suspect. He confesses that he once swore to get even with Abby for leaving him, but that all those feelings melted away when she got back to Harper's Island, and now he's not full of anything but ooey, gooey love. That's nice and everything, but it's not like Abby abandoned him. Her father practically shot her off the island out of a cannon; it wasn't her choice. They smooch.

MEANWHILE, back at the station, Danny and Madison are playing cards and discussing the intricacies of the Hansel and Gretel story. It's a worthy conversation, though not as compelling as Miranda Hobbes' thoughts on the matter. Unfortunately, it's interrupted by Wakefield entering and starting to strangle Danny with a belt, possibly his own. So, Danny... How do you feel about waiting for a jury of Wakefield's peers to get around to convicting him now? He manages to fight Wakefield off long enough to allow Shea and Madison time to escape, but cannot escape his doom forever, and Wakefield impales his head on one of those message-collecting spike thingies that's always killing people on TV. Sorry, Danny. You were a good egg, but you should have shot when you had the chance.

MEANWHILE, Trish and Henry snuggle on the bed. There's a knock at the door, but nobody enters when Henry calls out. He peeks out of the door with the gun, but doesn't see anything. Deciding to investigate, he tells Trish to lock herself in. MEANWHILE, Jimmy and Abby hear a noise in the woods, which turns out to be the fleeing Shea and Madison. Funny on an island with room for a bar and an inn and a marina and a crazy-old-man shack and a church and a party beach and a canyon and a bunch of locals' homes, none of which can be seen from any of the others, people are always stumbling across each other in the woods. Shea reports what has happened at the police station, and Abby sends them to meet up with Blond Tool at the radio station.

MEANWHILE, at the inn, Wakefield bursts in the door. Trish runs for it, which is no small feat when one is wearing a wedding dress and no shoes. She barricades herself in the bathroom, giving her enough time to bash out a window and jump. She runs into the woods, leaving a confusing and upsetting scene for Abby and Jimmy to find when they arrive at the inn. Wakefield pursues Trish through the woods, but cannot catch her before she finds Henry. Her relief soon turns to horror when we all finally find out who Wakefield's accomplice is. Not Trish herself, as was my first guess. Not Maggie, who's busy being dead and who was just a fun longshot for me. Not Booth, who I guess really was stupid enough to accidentally kill himself. Not Jimmy, to Grouchbutt's consternation. No, it's Henry. This knowledge doesn't do Trish an enormous amount of good, as Henry stabs her to death a few moments later. Huh, I guess being seen in your wedding dress before the ceremony really is bad luck. Wakefield catches up, and Henry greets him as his father. It's so nice when a father and son can bond over similar interests.

Next week on Harper's Island: DEATH!

Overall Grade: B-