Casino Royale with Cheese

Top Chef - Season 6, Episode 11

Previously on Top Chef: Natalie Portman wouldn't eat meat. Not even Clive Owen's. Jenc continued her depressing downward spiral, and the producers realized that with the Clash of the Golden Children almost upon us, there's no need for The Smarmy Guy anymore. Bye, Mike! Six chefs remain. Who will be eliminated tonight?

Monday Morning Quarterback session. Bryan talks to his family back home, and interviews about missing them a lot, which is never a good sign for one's continued success on a reality show. At least he shows a healthy balance between missing his loved ones and forging ahead with this opportunity. Too many people on TV show up acting like they were forced to try out for a reality show at gunpoint, and practically rend their clothes with grief when talking to someone back home. Jenc vows to pull herself together.

Quickfire Challenge. The chefs go to a kitchen at the Venetian, and receive a call from Padma, who's kickin' it in a hotel room bed with Nigella Lawson. No, not like that, pervos. She tells the chefs that with all the hotels in Vegas, room service is big business, and so the Quickfire challenge will be to prepare an appropriate breakfast in bed. They have half an hour to get everything ready. Robin and Eli go first. Eli works on a modified Reuben, making sure to include corned beef, because as we all know, without the corned beef, it ain't a Reuben. Robin is typically frenetic, and runs around hysterically. She and Eli leave to take their food upstairs, and Michael and Kevin move in. Michael whines about the mess Robin has left behind, and then expresses his consternation with the strict time limit. At no point does he realize that one may have followed from the other.

Meanwhile, Robin serves her food to Padma and Nigella. It's a blintz with goat cheese, caramelized pineapple, and blueberries. Eli then brings in his Reuben Benedict with fried egg, Swiss cheese, sauerkraut, and a Thousand Island hollandaise. It looks pretty good, although I'm used to seeing fried eggs with harder yolks. Down in the kitchen, Kevin works on a hearty steak and eggs plate. Michael has created too much work for himself, and isn't going to be able to get his food done in the way he wants. Into this mess walks Robin, who's been told by some PA or other to go in and get her stuff. Michael curtly boots her out of the work area, and for all the times that I've looked down on the Robin-bashing, and all the times I've groused about Michael's attitude, he's completely in the right here. He is still being timed, and she is really in the way. She complains about how Michael's treating her, but not wanting someone wandering around in your workspace in the middle of a challenge is not rude, and she should have known better.

Michael is next to serve his food, which is a take on Cuban eggs with banana puree, rice, and bacon. "The thing about breakfast is that you can eat it at any time of the day," Nigella non-sequiturs. Um, thanks for that brilliant piece of insider information. Let me jot that down under "The chefs that make things with the least detriments will have an advantage," "The hard part about shucking clams is knowing how to do it," and "I want to make something quick [for the Quickfire]." This is such an educational season! Kevin tells Padma and Nigella that he's prepared a hearty breakfast in the Southern tradition. It's steak and eggs with creme fraiche, green onion, aged Cheddar, and a dusting of coffee.

LabRat: "Yeah, cause no Southern breakfast is complete without creme fraiche."

Bryan and Jenc are cooking down in the kitchen. Jenc has experience with room service, and works on chipped beef that she proudly calls "shit on a shingle". It doesn't appear to occur to her that serving shit on a shingle to judges may not be the wisest choice, but who knows? Maybe they'll love Army food. Bryan works on a four-minute egg to serve over corn polenta. Jenc serves her creamed chipped beef on toast with potato and tomato. Bryan's plate includes a vanilla sauce, crab, asparagus, and the aforementioned polenta. Once he's gone, Nigella tells Padma the dish would have been a "star" without the vanilla.

Results. First in the bottom two is Bryan, whose vanilla flavors clashed horribly with the crab. The other bottom-dweller is Robin, whose blintzes were one-note, and had no contrast. "I wasn't proud of what I did today," Robin says for what feels like the sixtieth time. For the good news, Kevin's steak and eggs really embraced the challenge, while Eli's modified Reuben had a nice tang of sauerkraut. That's enough to carry the day, and Eli wins. Though he doesn't get immunity, his recipe will be featured in a Top Chef cookbook devoted entirely to Quickfire entries. This strikes me as hilarious, as Quickfire dishes are often hastily conceived and even more hastily put together. Stephanie was talented enough to win her entire season, and completely sucked at Quickfires. It doesn't seem like the portion of the show that home cooks would be very eager to emulate.

Elimination Challenge. Padma says that it will involve celebrating the Strip of Las Vegas by sending the chefs to create a dish inspired by different casinos. That's a good idea, and I'm surprised that it took until now for the casino culture to be integrated into a challenge to this degree. The chefs draw knives.

Bryan - Mandalay Bay
Eli - Circus Circus
Michael - New York, New York
Kevin - The Mirage
Jenc - Excalibur
Robin - Bellagio

Hmmm, weird. There's a sharp divide in Vegas casinos. There's the "new" portion of the Strip, with the really glittering places with fancy restaurants, bars, and spectacles. Then there's the older portion that may have the same things, but to a much lesser extent. I only bring this up because in the above list, all of the casinos belong to the newer grouping... Except Circus Circus. That's a much less fancy casino, and it makes me wonder why it was chosen over places like Caesar's Palace, the Venetian, or the Wynn. Padma tells the chefs that they'll be catering a party for 175 guests. The chefs march off for the evening to be inspired. The fact that they can finally escape their housemates for a while is probably a nice side effect.

Field trip. Michael says that New York City is restaurant Mecca, where many dreams succeed and fail. He begins to form an idea about honoring New York City firemen. These two concepts have nothing to do with one another. That's fine, but then why show both? Work with me, editors. Jenc takes in the meal, some grog, and a medieval show at the Excalibur. She's still having trouble coming up with an idea, which confuses me, as the casino has a lot more obvious inspiration than a place like the Mirage. Bryan takes in the shark reef at Mandalay Bay, which helpfully has a sign about sustainable fishing, so his inspiration is dealt with in forty-five seconds. On his way out, he gets a souvenir for his son. Stop talking about your family back home! That's elimination talk!

Over at the Bellagio, Robin is struck by the multicolored Dale Chihuly glass exhibits. I've seen those in a couple of art museums, and he once did an exhibit for our botanical garden, which was awesome:

Robin hopes to marry that sort of artistic flair with her food. She spends a moment at the famous fountains before we shift over to Kevin at the Mirage. He plays with the dolphins, which looks like grand fun. He talks about his signature style of simplicity and "less is more", which seems to be working just fine for him so far. He doesn't believe in flashy food or style over substance. That doesn't have much to do with any inspiration that the Mirage may give, so I guess we can only hope he doesn't incorporate dolphin into his dish. Eli heads to Circus Circus. What's to say? It's very circusy. Back at the house, Eli complains to the other chefs that there is no circus at Circus Circus. That's not entirely true, although it wouldn't surprise me if he missed the acrobats on the upper level. The stage is remarkably well-hidden. Can you tell I went there recently? The slots were not kind, although LabRat did well at the blackjack table.

Anyhoo, Eli tells the chefs that there weren't any restaurants, and Michael scoffs that he wasn't there to be inspired by the food, but by the environment. He points out that a circus is the most definitive concept that any of them had to be inspired by. I hate to agree with him yet again, but here we are. Robin senses that Eli is having trouble with his idea, and hopes to really push herself in the challenge, so that she can surge ahead.

The next day, we skip right over the shopping segment, which I frankly don't miss. The chefs stream into the Kitchen, where they have three and a half hours to prep. Kevin works on salmon with compressed vegetables. Again, I'm not sure what the connection between his food and the Mirage is, and I'd be curious to know. Michael hacks into chicken wings. Robin works on panna cotta, and will insert stiff panels of sugar to simulate the Chihuly glass. Jenc has settled on The Sword in the Stone as her inspiration, and starts a sauce with a couple of bottles of red wine. Eli incorporates circus themes with peanut soup with caramel apples. Popcorn and raspberry juice are also involved. Bryan cooks his fish in olive oil, and muses about how he's terrible at Quickfires, but seems to do very well in Elimination Challenges. Eli takes some time out to bash Robin some more. I agree that she's probably well past the point where she should have been eliminated, but her sticking around annoys the chefs I don't like, which brings me joy. Time winds down, and the chefs pack up their food for transport.

They are driven to the World Market Center, which I've never heard of, but has a great view of the Strip from the immense windows. The chefs unpack, and have one more hour to get everything ready. Michael cooks chicken. Jenc frets. Robin discovers that her sugar panels haven't set, and she won't be able to use them. When the hour is up, all the guests flood the room at the same time. A random guy enjoys Kevin's food. The judges head for Jenc's station first. She serves a chunk of grilled New York strip steak (as the stone) with a red wine reduction. There are beets, truffles, and herbs on top, and the whole thing is skewered by a plastic sword. Nigella finds the meat incredibly tough. Kevin serves up his wild Alaskan sockeye salmon with Napa cabbage and cucumber in a tomato broth base. All of the judges have very favorable things to say.

Michael serves boneless chicken wing confit with curry, and a disc of blue cheese. Everyone heartily enjoys it, just as they do in every bar in the country. Yes, it's a more upscale version of hot wings, and is probably very tasty. That said, Padma is cheerily describing blue cheese on chicken wings as "a nice surprise". Huh?!? Gee, Padma, why don't you stop by for dinner sometime, and I can "surprise" you by putting sour cream on a baked potato. I'm sure it's great food, but Michael has implied more than once that he's a better chef than Kevin because his food is more complicated, and here he is, serving something you can snarf by the bucket at the local dive. And since I'm already nitpicking... Saying your inspiration is derived from New York City by preparing something from Buffalo is a bit like preparing a Chicago-inspired dish from a St. Louis regional specialty.

Robin's panna cotta is based on flowers, which is what the Chihuly sculptures were formed into. She points out her table of ruined sugar, and explains what she was going for. That was probably a mistake. She should have said something like "I made these sugar panels, but decided the dish was better without them," or some other whopper like that. The judges find the panna cotta way too firm, because nobody on this show can ever make one. If for no other reason, I'm looking forward to the dessert spinoff just so someone can make a serviceable panna cotta.

Bryan has made an escabeche of halibut with a bouillabaisse consomme, pine nuts, a parsley coulis, and garlic chips. The judges all enjoy it quite a bit, calling it "balanced" and "professional". Huh, I guess all that talking about his family earlier was a false alarm. Eli's caramel apple peanut soup has ground popcorn and raspberry froth (which represents the pink dome of Circus Circus' decor). The results are not positive. None of the judges like it, and Padma outright hates it. The main problem seems to be one of texture. Yeah, texture issues are sometimes a bigger problem than flavor issues. It's why I don't eat pears. The judges choke it down, then head out of the party.

Judges' Table. In the fret 'n sweat, Kevin lightheartedly asks how everyone's food turned out, which is the first time he's sounded condescending, rather than genuinely curious. Maybe it was just the way it struck me. Nobody responds, which he takes to mean that everyone tanked. Padma enters, and summons Kevin, Michael, and Bryan to the table. Padma tells them they had the three favorite dishes of the evening. They all stare back resolutely, as if she just asked for one of their kidneys. Kevin's fish was great, and the vegetables were bright and flavorful. Bryan's food was quiet and elegant, much like he is. Michael's chicken wings were delicious and expressive. Toby gives him a backhanded compliment by calling his delicate style "effeminate". Nigella gets to announce the winner, and it turns out to be Michael. Well, those must have been some delicious wings, because he couldn't have won on inspiration. As a prize, he gets some wine and a trip to the winery where it's bottled. Nice.

Back in the Kitchen, Michael gets tepid applause. The waiting chefs are punted out to Losers' Table. Robin is already convinced she's toast. Once out there, Jenc admits to the judges that she didn't have a clear vision of what she wanted her food to be. Remember when she was such a strong contender? What the hell happened? It seems like one bad challenge punched all the momentum out of her. Ptom semi-excuses her by saying that perhaps she's just not familiar with medieval cooking. Nigella points out that while the other judges got tender cuts of meat, hers was too tough to slice through. Toby agrees that the meat was too tough.

Limecrete: "If there's one thing British judges don't get to whine about, it's tough meat."
LabRat: "I know. I don't get why British people get to judge this competition at all. What next, two Brits on the panel of a dental competition?"

Robin says that she thinks her vision and concept were good, but fell down on execution. The judges ask what happened, and she describes how her sugar didn't set properly. She was trying to accomplish techniques she hadn't worked with before, and Ptom asks her if she's being influenced by the chefs around her. She admits it. It's a fair question, but there's something off-putting about the phrasing. Of course, she shouldn't be rewarded for lackluster food, just because she hasn't done it before. However, Ptom has made a career out of slamming the chefs for staying in their comfort zones, and not pushing their limits. He's not over the hypocrisy line in this Robin inquiry, but he's dancing on it. Eli had a good idea, but both his flavors and textures were wildly off. The chefs are dismissed.

Deliberations. Every single one of Jenc's dish components was disappointing. The judges note that perhaps she has used up all of her early potential. Back in the Kitchen, Jenc herself is so beaten down, she's ready to pack up before she even gets eliminated. She's like the converse of Ariane, who started off in a whirlpool of despair and pulled herself together. Robin attempted to do things that are technically beyond her skill level. Ptom and Nigella complain that panna cotta is simplicity itself. Jeez, you wouldn't know it from this show. Eli's was just out-and-out bad. Bad texture, bad flavors, bad everything.

Elimination. Eli's dish was a mess. Jenc's food was boring. Robin's inspiration didn't make it onto the plate. In the end, Robin has run out of other chefs to hide behind, and is told to pack her knives and go. She shakes the judges' hands and thanks them for the opportunity. In her final interview, she says she's glad to have made it as far as she did, but that she lost herself in trying to impress people, and forgot to make the comfort food that she excels at. She gets a good-bye hug from Jenc, and tears up as she says that she's looking forward to what comes next, and that the experience has inspired her. Well, she may have been outmatched as a chef, but she seems like a perfectly nice lady. In small doses, anyway. I wish she could have stuck around longer than Eli, just to give him something to haunt his dreams for eternity, but doing that to Mike will just have to suffice.

Overall Grade: B-