The Amazing Race - Season 12, Episode 5
Previously on The Amazing Race: Burkina Faso was so wonderful, it could not be contained in one episode. The Pinkies charmed their way from village to village. Nathan and Jennifer couldn't match Azaria and Hendekea in speed, task ability, or communication with the locals, but it was soooooooo rude that the siblings reached the mat first. What gall they have. IB#1 made the completely reasonable, and perhaps even necessary decision to U-Turn Jason and Lorena, which caused some tension between her and IB#2, who has the strategic capability of a grapefruit. Phil may have left that last clause off. Jason and Lorena ended the race not with a bang, but a whimper, as they started in last and had no opportunity to catch up. Seven teams remain. Who will be eliminated next?
Opening credits. Nathan lobs an easy one to Jennifer. Good thing. I'm sure beating her in volleyball would be completely unfair.
Ouagadougou, Burkina Faso. Phil walks around in front of the Hotel De Ville, strolling past a statue that is asking for a Ricola. After his Opening Blather, Azaria and Hendekea are free to leave the mat at 6:45 AM. Rrrrrrrip! The clue tells them to travel more than 3,000 miles to Vilnius, Lithuania. Once there, they'll choose a marked car and drive to St. Anne's Church, where the next cluebox awaits. The church is extremely pretty. Azaria and Hendekea are snippy right off the mat. He barks at her for stepping into the street to hail a cab, and she barks at him because they kind of...need a cab. Nathan and Jennifer leave the mat at 6:46 AM. Jennifer pledges to use the "ball of fire" within them to "rage through" the leg and come in first. Jennifer is all about competition! As long as her competitors graciously step aside for her. The two lead teams grab taxis, and Azaria reads a part of the clue that says that all tickets must be purchased at an official airline ticketing office.
The airport ticket counter is closed, so Hendekea suggests going to find an internet connection somewhere. Jennifer cautions her that they can't buy tickets that way, but Hendekea was more in the mind of just researching what flights are available. The four of them find an information counter, and are told by a lady wearing an "Are You Ready?" T-shirt that there is another ticketing office in Ouagadougou itself, which she thinks opens at 9 AM. The teams decide to stick it out, and Jennifer hops online to check for Air France tickets. Meanwhile, Ronald and Christina are leaving the mat at 7:17 AM. They're still working on their communication. Christina tells us she's been consciously and repeatedly telling her dad that she loves him, which she knows makes him a little uncomfortable. He responds by rhapsodizing about Lithuanian pastries. Ah, the awkward parent-child bond. Nicolas and Donald leave the mat at 7:18 AM. They interview something patchy about how Donald may have issues with his memory. I don't know, it wasn't very clear. In any event, they have trouble spotting an available taxi.
The Pinkies are off at 7:22 AM. They hustle out of the pitstop, and spot an available cab before Nicolas and Donald are able to walk over to it. Kynt can't wait to get someplace with "spooky architecture". He should hang out in North St. Louis. From out of the cab window, we can see that it's raining. Again. It's like the same storm is following the teams around from country to country. Hey, maybe it's racing, too! Kynt baffles me by saying that he doesn't try to control Vyxsin, but he does try to guide her. Huh? She's pretty clearly worn the pants on this team from the very beginning. How odd. Nicolas and Donald find a cab. Ronald/Christina and the Pinkies catch up to the teams at the information booth. Nicolas and Donald find an internet cafe (or as Donald puts it, an "internet buffet") in town. Yum, all-you-can-eat Pentium chips. Hendekea calls Air France and learns of a flight connecting through Paris that leaves at 10:45 PM. Yikes, that's awfully late.
The IBs leave the mat at 7:44 AM. IB#2 tells the cab driver to take them to the Burkina Faso airport. Sure, why not? Don't you ask for the America airport? IB#1 points out that maybe it'd be a good idea to specify Ouagadougou, and IB#2 snits in interview that if the IBs hope to win this race, they're going to have to be a unified team. Well, maybe IB#1 would be more willing to listen to you if you weren't so damn stupid. IB#2 also still feels guilty about U-Turning Jason and Lorena, because she doesn't like to "hurt" people. Man, I'd love to play Monopoly with IB#2 sometime. I could explain how much it hurts my feelings when she expects the rent.
LabRat: "I'm surprised she even remembers the U-Turn."
TK and Rachel are last to depart, at 7:59 AM. Coming in second-to-last was very humbling, and they say they need to change their game to accommodate how fierce the competition is getting. Just tell IB#2 how horrible she is for being in front of you! She'll fold like a card table. Kynt informs the IBs of the 10:45 flight. Ronald is tired of sticking around, so he and Christina leave to go to the Air France ticket office in town, to see if they're open. Jennifer's bitchface does not approve, and she scoffs "let them go". TK and Rachel find the other teams, but the information booth is so crammed with racers by this point, they decide to stroll off and see if they can get some information elsewhere. Ronald and Christina have found that the Air France office is open. Ha! I love that the editors wedge in as much "Suck it, Jennifer!" footage as possible. Christina asks the ticket agent if she speaks English. Not much, as it turns out. I'm not sure why Christina doesn't ask any of the other people standing around, but she sticks with this lady, who we'll just call Eris for reasons that will become clear.
Christina asks for the quickest way to Vilnius in English, but manages "More quickly. More quickly." in French. Eris checks the computer, and finds a series of flights that go from Ouagadougou to Paris, then Prague, then Vilnius. It will get them into Vilnius at 9:30 PM, which Ronald is understandably not thrilled about. Christina thinks they should just go to Paris and fish around for better flights there. I've heard of worse ideas, but Ronald hasn't. He points out that it's not like they're running for a plane right now, so they have ample time to figure out what they're doing. Christina is only asking about Air France, so Ronald tells her to ask about other airlines. He's overly pushy about it, as usual, but at least this time he's got a point. Nicolas and Donald are on a computer, and find a flight that will get them into Vilnius at 1:25 PM. Much better. Eris has found a better route for Ronald and Christina, but if this show has taught us nothing else, it has taught us that ticket agents are always wrong. The flight she has found gets them into Vilnius at 2:10 PM.
Hendekea finds out about the 1:25 PM flight. She and Azaria head for the ticket office, with Nathan/Jennifer and the IBs on their heels. The Pinkies decide to stay at the airport. Nicolas and Donald arrive at the ticket office as Ronald and Christina are leaving. Hilariously, both teams get very hush-hush, because neither one wants to tip off the other about their flight information. Christina even voices-over that she wants to keep the information about her terrific flight under wraps. The flight that arrives forty-five minutes after the other one. Hehe. Nicolas asks Eris about the 1:25 PM flight. Azaria/Hendekea and Nathan/Jennifer arrive at the ticket office. Nicolas gets jumpy and tries to tell Eris not to book the other teams on the flight. Much as I've been fuming about the teams being pissy for not having their hands held, I must point out that doing that was a pretty stank move to pull. I'd be grumpier about it if it had any prayer of succeeding, which, of course it doesn't, because:
1) Eris can barely string five words together in English. I don't think a hurriedly-whispered devious plot is going to be interpreted correctly.
2) As in all cases (but the Japanese Liar, damn him), it's one thing to try and obscure information from other teams, but quite another to try and talk service personnel into ignoring their jobs to help you screw over your race competition.
3) As Hendekea points out, they're standing right there, and can hear every word Nicolas is saying.
Yeah, I wouldn't sign Nicolas up for spy duty anytime soon. Maybe we should call him Not-a Hari. The IBs arrive. Azaria and Hendekea step up to another agent, but pause to ask Nicolas and Donald what flight they're on. Nicolas doesn't want to give up the information. Azaria is obviously perturbed by this, but doesn't want to let on that he cares (especially since Jennifer is standing there, and if Azaria complains that another team isn't doing enough for him, he'll undoubtedly be struck by lightning). The agent that Azaria and Hendekea talk to has a better grasp of English than Eris, so they have no problem getting the 1:25 PM flight, which connects through Amsterdam. Then Eris tells Nicolas and Donald that there's no room on the same flight, which they specifically requested before Azaria and Hendekea even came into the building. Ouch. The only other flight Eris mentions goes through Prague, and gets into Vilnius at 5:35 PM. They don't have any other options for the time being, so they go ahead and book tickets, then head for the airport. Azaria happily tells Nathan that Nicolas and Donald got struck with "bad karma". On first viewing, I thought he was saying this because Nicolas wouldn't tell him what flight they were on, which pissed me off, but he's probably referring to the whole "don't-sell-this-flight-to-them" thing, and in that case, I have to agree. Donald tells Nicolas he did the best he could and "C'est la vie. That's French, in case you didn't know." Hahaha!
Nathan/Jennifer and the IBs talk to their agents. TK and Rachel have apparently wandered around for long enough, and arrive at the ticket office. Nathan and Jennifer get tickets on the flight that gets into Vilnius at 1:25 PM. Which they buy from Eris. Who just told Nicolas and Donald that there was no more room on it. What is this woman smoking? Did she just screw over Nicolas and Donald on purpose? Could she just not understand what they wanted? Is she dumb as a post? Tragically, these are questions that will go unanswered. TK and Rachel ask for the same tickets, but Eris tells them the flight is full, even though the other agent is currently selling said tickets to the IBs. Seriously, what the hell? Maybe Nathan/Jennifer and the IBs reserved tickets from the internet office, so there really were no seats left for Nicolas and Donald. That's just an idea, though. Nicolas and Donald find a different Air France office at the airport, and thankfully, someone who understands what they want. TK and Rachel buy tickets from Eris that connect through Frankfurt, and get them into Vilnius at 1:35 PM. Where was this flight when Eris told Nicolas and Donald the best she could do was 5:35 PM?!? Arrrrgh! Nathan and Jennifer are at the airport's Air France office (I guess to pick up their boarding passes or something), and Nicolas finds out they were able to get the 1:25 PM arrival after he was expressly told it was full. This does not fill him with joy. The Pinkies get the 1:35 PM flight. Nicolas and Donald find out about this flight soon after, and change their tickets. So after all that kerfluffle, they've lost ten minutes. Not bad.
IB#1 tells IB#2 that they need to get seats towards the front of the plane. I really don't know how much time that'll save once you arrive in a new country and have to go through customs, but at least she's trying to think strategically. Which is fine, but then she crosses the line by trying to lay claim to the entire office, telling Hendekea that they'd like to be alone. Man, Hendekea gets griped at a lot. She and Azaria actually do clear out (along with Nathan and Jennifer, muttering about people's "true colors").
After IB#1 gives us the titular quote, IB#2 takes the opportunity to reiterate her gripe that they're pissing everyone off, and are going to be on the business end of a U-Turn if everyone hates them. IB#1 points out that if they hadn't U-Turned Jason and Lorena, they may have been eliminated last week. It's still as true now as it was then. IB#2 has more of a point in this case, because it's probably not wise to raise the other teams' hackles over something as inconsequential as seat placement. Even so, I feel like nobody would U-Turn the IBs because they have the tendency to be bitchy. At least, I hope not. Using penalties out of spite is dumb and useless. TK is sagely telling Nathan and Jennifer that "people" (i.e., IB#2) are upset over the U-Turn, and teams that stress out tend to fall apart and get eliminated. IB#1 tells IB#2 that if she wants her to leave IB#2 alone for a while, that's fine, because IB#2 is clearly just going to be annoyed with whatever IB#1 says. Agreeing with IB#1 so much makes me feel dirty. It's really something that she possibly helped save IB#2 from elimination last week, and the way IB#2 repays her is by carping at her. They bicker about who's the more methodical thinker. IB#2 sits around looking consternated. Actually, she looks like she doesn't have a thought in her head.
Commercials. If you believe the advertising world, most of the gifts given this holiday season will involve jewelry. Sorry, people on my list. Diamond necklaces aren't in the cards.
We pick up with the IBs still being pissed at each other (though IB#1 calls it being "feisty" -- ick). That evening, Ronald and Christina are talking to Nathan and Jennifer, and learn that their wonderful 2:10 PM arrival time isn't so wonderful, after all. They decide that the 1:25 PM flight has too close of a connection time, so they're not going to even attempt to improve their tickets. I guess I can understand not wanting to cut a connection too closely, but to not even research what's available when you know for a fact that your tickets aren't the best you can do? That sounds like a mistake to me. They thank Nathan and Jennifer for the information, and leave to board their flight to Paris. Oh, maybe that's why they didn't try to get better tickets. If they did, they may have missed the option of catching the flight they already have. That's more understandable. All the teams eventually take off for Paris, and then their connections. Phil recaps the results of all this airline shuffling. To wit: The connection through Amsterdam (getting into Vilnius at 1:25 PM) carries Azaria/Hendekea, Nathan/Jennifer, and the IBs. The connection through Frankfurt (getting into Vilnius at 1:35 PM) carries the Pinkies, TK/Rachel, and Nicolas/Donald. The connection through Prague (getting into Vilnius at 2:10 PM) carries Ronald and Christina. Thanks, Phil.
Vilnius, Lithuania. A statue would like us to know that a field goal is good. Wait, that sounds familiar. Oh, great. I'm starting to repeat myself. The first flight arrives on schedule at 1:25 PM, and the three lead teams dash out of the airport to find the marked cars. Nathan and Jennifer find theirs first, and once they're on the way, Jennifer consults a map and tells Nathan to take a left. A gong noise lets the audience in on the fact that this may not have been exemplary navigation. The second flight arrives at 1:35 PM. The Pinkies run to an information booth to get directions to St. Anne's, which Kynt asks for in a very pronounced British accent for some reason. Nicolas and Donald spot the marked cars almost immediately, which means that they've already passed a couple of the teams on the earlier flight. TK and Rachel find theirs next, and happily note that the IBs are still running around the parking lot. Eventually, everyone finds their cars.
Nathan and Jennifer have gotten lost. As in all of their other setbacks so far, Nathan becomes immediately flustered. I'd call them Team Immediately Flustered if it didn't take so long to type. The wrong turn that they initially took also claims TK/Rachel and the IBs. At 2:10 PM, Ronald and Christina arrive in Vilnius. They know they're in last place, so Christina makes the smart decision to hire a taxi to lead them to St. Anne's. Ronald compliments her quick thinking. Aw. Nathan and Jennifer continue to drive around in circles, so even after all that hassle of buying tickets, Nicolas and Donald reach the church in first place. Whee! They spot the cluebox and get their next clue. Rrrrrrrip! Roadblock! "Who's a good listener?" Phil explains that in this Roadblock, the chosen team member has to be a Lithuanian messenger. They will choose one of four designated old women working nearby, who will hand them a package, which includes a slip of paper with a person's name. She will direct them to another location where the person can be found (all of these people will be in the same place), and the Roadblocker will exchange the package for another. Then, they'll deliver the second package to another specific person and location (which are not all the same place), where they'll receive the next clue.
Nicolas takes on the Roadblock, and approaches one of the adorable old women. She tells him to find Veinius. There's a name you don't hear too often. Veinius, like all of the first package recipients, will be in the Vilnius University courtyard. Nicolas jots down the information, thanks the woman, gets the package, and darts off. Azaria and Hendekea are next to the church, but manage to bypass the cluebox, so the Pinkies get there just ahead of them. Kynt and Hendekea take the Roadblock. Nicolas finds Veinius, who directs him to find Olga at a hair salon. This is like a big game of "Where in Vilnius is Carmen Sandiego?". Kynt's old woman (the Lithuanian old woman, that is -- not Vyxsin) sends him to find Egle. Hendekea's sends her to find what sounds like "Tomas", though I doubt that's what it really was.
As Nathan and Jennifer pull up to a store for directions, Nathan admonishes Jennifer that they've got to run, no matter what. Smash cut to Jennifer taking off in a jog, while Nathan whines that she needs to wait for him. Hahahaha! The shop-keeper tells them that the church is a twenty-minute walk away. Nathan and Jennifer are flustered. TK and Rachel get some directions, while the IBs are apparently hoping to trip over the church at some point. IB#2 says she's going to turn the car around, and when she backs up, we see out of IB#1's window that a bus is bearing down on their car. It's a legitimately scary moment, although now I'm thinking that the blaring horn and screeching brakes sounds were added in later. IB#1 freaks out, and IB#2 snips at her to relax. "Oh, my God. A bus almost just killed me. I'm sorry; I should relax," IB#1 rightfully gripes.
Ronald and Christina's taxi idea has paid off, and they reach the Roadblock ahead of all three lost teams. Although they know Christina is more of a listener, and Ronald more of a talker, they assign the task to him. I guess that's because she milked the camel, vaulted the ditch, and strapped the goat to a bicycle. All he's done so far is pedal across the ravine. He thinks he's got his hernia under control, and gets his first package, which sends him to find "Milde".
Nicolas asks around the neighborhood, but nobody has any idea where the hair salon he's looking for is. Kynt and Hendekea deliver their first packages. Kynt is sent to the Gaby Cafe, and Hendekea will be in search of the same hair salon that is giving Nicolas so much trouble. Nathan and Jennifer are running for the church. Why they've abandoned their car is beyond me. They manage to fight as they run, with Nathan saying that he can't believe the person Jennifer has turned into over the course of the race, and that it's "the ugliest thing [he's] ever seen". She assures him the feeling is mutual. Kynt finds the cafe, and delivers his package. He actually takes the time to drop into the chair across from the clue-wrangler, and asks for the next clue as if casually mentioning it over a nice lunch they were having. Hehe. He goes back to Vyxsin to read the clue. Rrrrrrrip! It directs teams to drive themselves to Lietuvos Liaudies Buities Muziejus. Oh, there. Phil explains that it's an outdoor ethnographic museum in the town of Rumsiskes. Once they manage to find that mouthful, they will follow a marked path to Dzukija Village, where the next clue awaits.
The Pinkies get directions and take off. TK and Rachel find their way to the church, where TK takes the Roadblock. The IBs are still lost, and for once, IB#2 is the one with the point when she suggests stopping to ask someone for help. IB#1 says that'll slow them down. Sure, why would you need to know where you're going? IB#2 essentially says the same thing. Nathan and Jennifer finally find the church, where Jennifer takes the Roadblock. Business at the hair salon must be awful, because nobody has any idea where it is. Hendekea is having just as much trouble as Nicolas in locating it. TK finds a guy who appears to be stoned to lead him to the university courtyard. I guess he sensed a kindred spirit. Ronald gets directions. TK arrives at the courtyard, and finds the person he's looking for wandering around in the middle of a fountain. Maybe everyone in Vilnius is stoned. TK is sent to a restaurant to deliver his second package. His stoner buddy knows exactly where it is.
Jennifer gets directions. Ronald drops off his first package, and is sent to the restaurant. The IBs convince a neighboring car to lead them to the church. Ronald strolls by the Non-Roadblockers on his way to the restaurant, and Christina unhelpfully alerts him to the fact that other teams are on his tail. "Don't give me pressure! Silence, sil vous plait!" he yells, which I would have supported coming from anyone but him. He's still got a lot of penance to do for the Amsterdam leg. Christina shrugs it off, and Ronald runs into a nearby hotel for directions. Thanks to his stoner buddy, TK has completed the Roadblock, and vaulted to second place from fifth. He and Rachel get some quick directions, and take off for the museum. Ronald drops off his second package, and thanks the clue-wrangler with "Merci beaucoup." I guess his brain is still stuck in Burkina Faso mode. He quickly corrects himself by thanking the clue-wrangler in Lithuanian, which makes him sound like he's sneezing. Christina is thrilled to see him return so quickly, and they head for the museum. Jennifer drops off her first package, and is sent to the same cafe as Kynt. A nearby local agrees to lead her there. Nicolas and Hendekea search fruitlessly for the hair salon.
Jennifer finds the cafe and gets her next clue. Hendekea finally finds someone who knows where the hair salon is, and I have to say, if this lady patronizes it, I can see why it's so unpopular. Hendekea successfully begs her to lead the way. Jennifer returns to Nathan, who is "so proud" of her. They'll never fight again! They head back to their car. Hendekea drops off her package, and returns to Azaria. Donald is looking none too happy, especially when the IBs arrive. IB#2 volunteers to take the Roadblock, but IB#1 vetoes her by saying IB#2 "interprets things wrong". Ouch. IB#1 runs off. Nicolas walks right by the salon without realizing it. Donald begins to smell elimination.
Commercials. I'm actually writing this back half of the recap off a commercial-free tape. Oh, no! Now I have no idea what to buy!
Donald tells the cameraman that he's been waiting for Nicolas for a few hours (yikes!), and since the IBs have caught up, elimination is looking pretty certain. He manages to say all this in a very matter-of-fact tone, with no apparent anger or disappointment in Nicolas, which was very nice to see. IB#1 gets her first package, and heads for the university courtyard. Nicolas finds someone who can lead him to the hair salon. God, finally. That was getting painful. The Pinkies reach the ethnographic museum. Oh, crud. It's one of those horrible product-placement tasks. I understand that flying all these people around the world isn't cheap, but that's what commercials and sponsored pitstop prizes are for. I refuse to accept that sending people to Lithuania (to a cultural museum, no less), and forcing them to participate in an extended ad for an American business is a worthy task. This particular one is made even worse by the misappropriation of Dave and Lori's Happy Tootling Nerd Music. BOO! On the plus side, I can ignore all the scenes involving this crappy task, which will save all sorts of time.
The Pinkies begin Crap Task. IB#1 drops off her first package. I'm praying she gets sent to the obscure hair salon, but no such luck. She's sent to the Shakespeare Hotel, where the maids no doubt yell "Out, out, damned spot!" every time they wash the sheets. IB#1 easily finds someone to lead her there. She and Nicolas drop off their second packages at about the same time. IB#1 gets back to the church first, so Nicolas has dropped from first to last place over the course of the Roadblock. Yeesh. Nicolas returns, and he and Donald take off before the IBs are done getting directions to the ethnographic museum. The Pinkies finish Crap Task, and proceed down the path to a church, where the next clue awaits. Rrrrrrrip! Detour! Phil explains that both of the Detour choices involve the Midsummer Festival currently being celebrated in the village. Locals rejoice all over the place. The Detour choice is Count Down or Step Up.
In Count Down, teams makes their way through the festivities to a marked section of picket fence. They then count every picket, and present the final number to a clue-wrangler. If they've arrived at the right number (717), they'll get their next clue. If they're wrong, it's back to the fence. What Phil doesn't mention are the mischievous costumed celebrants who will be actively trying to distract the counters. Heh. Good. In Step Up, the team members must hop up on wooden stilts, and walk along a marked path. If someone falls off the stilts at any point, they must go back to the start and try again. Once both team members make it, they'll get the next clue. The Pinkies head for Step Up. TK/Rachel and Ronald/Christina get started on Crap Task. The Pinkies reach the festival, and we all agree that it looks like grand fun. Kynt calls it his favorite moment of the race so far, and they certainly fit in better than anyplace they've been. Including Louisville. Despite the fact that the festival is so awesome, they soon discover that walking on stilts is no simple matter. TK/Rachel and Ronald/Christina finish Crap Task.
Villagers sing heartily as the Pinkies attempt to hobble along on their stilts. Kynt falls off shortly before the finish. Vyxsin falls soon after, and they head back to the start. The villagers just keep on singing. TK and Rachel reach the Detour, and choose Step Up. Ronald and Christina arrive, and choose the same thing. Jigga-what? If there's one task I wouldn't recommend for an elderly gentleman who's been steadily disintegrating before our very eyes, it's that one. Weirdos. Nathan and Jennifer speed through Crap Task. They would. Azaria and Hendekea get started on it. Nicolas/Donald and the IBs are still driving. TK and Rachel catch up to the Pinkies at the stilts. When Ronald and Christina arrive, Vyxsin suggests ditching for Count Down. Kynt agrees, and they jog to the fence. Ronald quickly falls off his stilts. "It's OK. Practice makes perfect," Christina says. "I don't want this hernia to pop out!" Ronald carps. Poor Ronald. If only there were something he could have done in place of this physically strenuous task. Something involving counting pickets, perhaps?
TK reaches the finish line. Rachel falls off her stilts. Kynt reads a section of the clue that tells them not to include fenceposts or gates in their final number. They begin counting. Nathan and Jennifer arrive, and choose Count Down. Jigga-what? So the old man with the hernia opted for the physical task, and these two, who have the patience of a toddler that just ate a hundred Pixy Stix, choose the concentration one? Morons. Azaria and Hendekea finish Crap Task. Nathan and Jennifer happily hoot and dance their way through the festival. They're all about getting into the spirit of the celebration. They reach the fence, and Jennifer asks Nathan to just stand back and let her tear through it. The Pinkies count pickets. Jennifer's hot on their heels. A group of children make a bunch of noise, and successfully throw the Pinkies' count off, so they backtrack to the beginning, even though they agreed as of picket #300. Set landmarks, people! Rachel, Christina, and Ronald hobble along. Azaria and Hendekea reach the Detour, and choose Step Up. Hendekea sounds notably less excited about it than Azaria.
Christina reaches the end of the stilt course, and kisses the clue-wrangler with relief. Ronald is still having trouble, and Rachel makes it to the end. That'll do it for her team, so she and TK get the clue that tells them to make their way on foot to the next pitstop, the Aukstaitja Windmill. Phil tells us that it was built in 1884, and is still functional. You go, Lithuanian agriculture! Last team to the windmill will have as much success as Don Quixote in getting any further. As TK and Rachel run for the mat, the Pinkies arrive at the correct number of pickets.
They get their clue, and easily spot the windmill. They don't have enough time to catch up, however, and TK and Rachel arrive at the mat as team number one. I like TK and Rachel, but this is some pretty clear evidence that a bunch of teams made some big mistakes today. The greeter is super-cool, as usual, and he gives them a jolly welcome. Phil tells them they've arrived first, and they scream in victory. They win an incredible ten-day trip to Japan, and will get to see the famous cherry blossoms, go to the top of Mount Fuji, see an imperial palace, go white-water rafting, and soak in some hot mineral springs. They're beside themselves with glee. Man, I would be too. Good prize. Jason and Lorena are watching this somewhere and spitting on their all-terrain bikes. TK interviews that they were alone for most of the day, and thought they were at the back of the pack, so they're extra relieved. The Pinkies soon reach the mat as team two.
Jennifer counts pickets. "86, 87, 88, 89, 100". Whoops! Azaria and Hendekea aren't having much luck at the stilts, and decide to switch tasks. Nathan and Jennifer are distracted by the nearby villagers, and tell them to shut up. Not so in the spirit of the festival now, are they? Fuckers. A few steps from the end of the stilt course, Ronald takes a nasty spill.
Non-commercials.
Ronald is in some pain, and Christina offers encouragement. Ronald goes back to start again. I have to say, it's pretty impressive that the ailing old man isn't giving up, when a couple of perfectly healthy teams couldn't hack it. Jennifer has reached a final picket count of 727, so if she hadn't skipped those numbers before, she'd have been correct. The clue-wrangler turns her down, and she sneers "Whaaat?", as if he's lying or something. Back to the fence, Tantrum Queen. Nathan says he'll also count this time, and Jennifer tells him to do it silently. Azaria and Hendekea agree to count separately. Ronald steadily makes his way down the stilt course. Barefoot, no less. He's wobbly, but makes it to the end, to applause from the crowd. Christina congratulates him, and they head for the windmill.
The IBs are asking for directions to the village. Nicolas and Donald have found their way there already, and easily complete the Crap Task. They're not far ahead of the IBs, though, and Nicolas tells Donald that they're going to have to pick up the pace. The IBs finish the Crap Task. Azaria/Hendekea and Nathan/Jennifer attempt to count pickets without letting the costumed locals distract them. Three guesses as to which of the teams handles it better. Yes, Nathan and Jennifer are not only distracted, but seem unable to grasp the idea that they might be better at counting the pickets separately if they weren't standing three inches apart. Azaria and Hendekea arrive at the correct number, get the clue, and head for the windmill. Ronald and Christina arrive at the mat as team three, which is amazing when you consider their late flight and slow Detour progress. Christina is extremely proud of the way Ronald ran the leg, and in the way he's been steadily treating her better. Jennifer actually stops Nathan from counting because his voice is annoying her, even though he had a good rhythm going. I'm ready for these two to be eliminated any time you are, Karma. You've been doing so well at weeding out the irritating teams. Why stop now?
Nicolas and Donald reach the Detour. Donald has a scrap of self-awareness, so they choose Count Down. Nathan and Jennifer arrive at the incorrect number again. The IBs reach the Detour, and choose Count Down. Jennifer manages to interrupt Nathan's counting again. He heads back to the first picket in aggravation, calling her a bitch on the way. I guess I should officially be against someone calling one's girlfriend nasty names to her face, but if the shoe fits... Once he reaches the beginning of the fence he asks why she would tell him to be quiet, then ask him a question in the middle of his count. And, point. He refuses to count pickets again, and says they're going to do the stilts. They bicker on their way over. She can't understand why he's being so mean to her. Nathan could probably tell her the reasons, if it weren't already obvious that he can't count that high. Azaria and Hendekea check in as team four. They're subdued, but pleased. Nicolas and Donald reach the Detour site, to Nathan and Jennifer's frustration. Jennifer wails as she topples from her stilts.
Nicolas and Donald begin counting. Nathan finishes the stilt course. The IBs arrive, and begin counting pickets in a frenzied panic. That'll go well for them. Jennifer finishes the stilt course, and the Bickersons (there we go) head for the windmill. Nicolas realizes he's been counting fenceposts and gates. The Bickersons reach the mat as team five. They're surprised that they're not eliminated, though I don't know why. They saw Nicolas and Donald behind them. The IBs have no counting system down, while Nicolas reaches a final number, and goes back to subtract the ones he knows are extra. The IBs enter their final stage of meltdown, and IB#1 crabs to IB#2 (as she's trying to count, of course) that she's on a team of her own. Nicolas methodically works out his answer. IB#1 passive-aggressively tells IB#2 that she can count the pickets, but if she's wrong, it's all her fault. Naturally. Nicolas' method pays off, and he has the correct answer. To the windmill! The IBs arrive at the incorrect number. Nicolas and Donald check in as team number six. Close one.
The sun sets. The IBs arrive at the correct number, and run for the windmill holding hands, because they've acted like such good friends lately. They are last, and they are eliminated. Sweet. IB#2 says that it breaks her heart, because it meant so much to her to do well in the competition. It meant so much that she bitched about IB#1 making the correct strategic choice last week, to the point that they completely fell apart. Let's put her on a Wheaties box. IB#1 is proud of herself for being able to put aside pedicures for a while to marvel at the fact that some people don't have as much money as she does. How noble.
Next week on The Amazing Race: Azaria and Hendekea fight. The Bickersons...bicker. Nice to see that Hell hasn't frozen over yet.
Overall Grade: B+
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