Top Chef - Season 11, Episode 11
Previously on Top Chef: The chefs started their day with an invigorating cup of coffee, as everyone should. Shirley won the challenge, immunity, money, and a summer free of pit stains. In the Elimination Challenge, the chefs cooked the food that reminds them of home. Nicholas threw his heart, soul, and tears into his gnocchi - literally, in the case of the latter. It paid off, and he won the challenge. On the losing end, what apparently reminds Travis of home (other than homophobia) is undercooked biscuits. Eight chefs remain. Who will be eliminated tonight?
Quickfire. New Orleans has certainly offered the largest range of guest judges, and we continue that streak with Questlove, who joins Padma to explain this week's challenge. But first, a drumline busts in and does a march around the Kitchen. They sound pretty awesome, and Carrie grooves in the background. A drumline means drumsticks, and drumsticks mean...drumstick challenge! Oh, nice. Breasts get all the attention (and not just in human ladies), but I'm often happy to snag the legs out of a mixed chicken bucket. It's not just chicken on offer. The chefs can choose from a variety of poultry, from turkey to duck to squab.
The hitch is that it's first-come, first-serve, so when Padma gives the go-ahead, the chefs rush the table like it's Black Friday. And just like it's that hallowed, idiotic tradition, someone nearly gets trampled. Shirley falls, and when Nicholas goes to help her up, she helps herself to the duck legs he was going to take. Ha! Whoops. Well, at least that's the last of the indignities Nicholas will suffer at the hands of his competitors today, right? Right?!? Thirty minutes later, it's time for a drumstick feast.
Padma and Questlove go down the line. Dishes of note include Carrie's squab, which sounds a little odd (they were marinated in thyme, juniper, and cocoa powder and served with a fig mostarda), but looks good. Carlos has hacked his drumsticks to the bone, and shards of it wind up in the food. Bleh. Nina has jerked guinea hen, and has used Scotch Bonnet peppers. Ouch! Carlos' hack job lands him in the bottom three, alone with poor Nicholas, whose quail is too salty, and Justin, whose chicken drumsticks are too boring. Carrie and Nina are joined in the top three by Brian, who has managed to make a surprisingly good chicken soup in a half hour. But it's Carrie that takes the win and immunity. There's nothing that figs can't do!
Elimination Challenge. It sounds pretty rough. The chefs will be using the cafeteria equipment at Louisiana State University to serve 500 freshmen. And given my appetite when I was a college freshman, that'll be like serving 1000 adults. The winner takes home a new car. It's always strange to see how disparate the prizes are on this show. One week, the winner gets nothing, and the next week, it's a car. Odd. Nobody can plan their dishes in advance for this challenge, since they have no idea what they'll be working with, so we fill time with a tour of the school grounds. Apparently, LSU keeps a live tiger on campus, which sounds like a terrible idea for students and tiger alike.
When the chefs get to the cafeteria kitchen, there's another free-for-all, this time for cooking stations as well as ingredients. Though Shirley calls dibs on the flat-top grill (plancha), Carlos insists he needs it more, so Shirley reluctantly agrees to work with the wood-burning oven. If she were making a pizza, that'd be fine, but she's working on beef fried rice. Yikes. She changes her plan to roast beef and tomatoes with a potato puree. Carrie has no wish to work at the cold station, but takes the bullet because she has immunity. Giant vats of food are made. You could run a hog farm with the amount of grits Nicholas is stirring. As service begins, the chefs are presented with their very own lunch ladies as assistants. These remarkably good-natured women are heartily welcomed, but the meet-and-greet is cut short when a stampede of students flood in.
The kids line up for Brian's shrimp cake with spinach and chipotle aioli, and Shirley's roast beef is extremely popular as well. Nobody even wants to try Carrie's blanched broccoli with yogurt sauce and pita chips. I confess I don't like cold broccoli, either. Stephanie has made a tomato soup and toasted pimento cheese sandwich. She attempts to gussy up the presentation by serving it with the sandwich pre-dunked in the soup. Justin has a cold shrimp salad, with asparagus, cauliflower, and garlic puree. Nicholas' roasted pork with rosemary looks incredibly good, and is served with parmesan grits and bacon/brown sugar gravy. Carlos is working on tilapia, and wants to use Nicholas' oven for final prep. Nicholas needs it for his own dish, and denies permission. Because remember? When the eight chefs divided up the eight stations? And Carlos just had to have the plancha? So when the judges ding Carlos for taking too long at service, Carlos blames Nicholas for "stealing" his oven. He does it with half of a just-kidding twinkle in his eye, but that's still a pretty assy thing to do. Nina overhears this and agrees with me. I mean, not me, specifically. Although that would be amazing. Of course, the judges can't resist tattling to Nicholas about Carlos' accusation, and this does not fill him with happiness. He sits on his anger for the time being, though, as there's work to do. That's why I almost titled this entry "Saint Nicholas", what with it being so close to Christmas and all.
Fret 'n sweat. Nicholas finally has a chance to have it out with Carlos. He's direct and curt about Carlos' backstabbing, but he never gets overly angry or irrational. I like Nicholas; he's remarkably mature for a reality show competitor. Actually, I don't even dislike Carlos, either. I think he did a stupid thing, but I believe he was venting without a sense of what that would snowball into. Still, man. If you're going to snap, snap at one of the other chefs. Not the judges. Padma comes in and summons Brian, Carlos, and Shirley to Judges' Table. These are unsurprisingly the top three of the evening, but there's never any suspense that Carlos will win the challenge. The judges have been vociferously complaining about his lengthy service time since the food first hit the plate, but at least his flavors were spot-on. That brings it down to Brian's shrimp cakes and Shirley's roast beef. Brian's cakes drove the students wild, while Shirley magnificently adapted to her challenging cooking equipment. The fact that she was able to turn out stellar roast beef with a pizza oven pushes her over the top, and she wins the challenge. And a car! She sure knows which challenges to dominate.
Bottom three. It shakes down to Stephanie, Nina, and Justin, though the judges are sure to mention that Carrie is damned lucky she has immunity. Stephanie's grilled cheese included feta and cottage cheese, and it turned out too chunky as a result. Serving it in the soup only exacerbated its problems, though the soup itself was great. Justin's dish was a big ol' plate of blandness. The judges don't understand the garlic puree at all. This is Nina's first appearance in the bottom three, and unlike Justin, she doesn't look for convenient places to deflect criticism when it's thrown her way. Her fried chicken's breading was disappointing, and she didn't have enough corn puree to serve all the diners. I prepare myself for Stephanie's ouster, and am pleasantly surprised when Justin is told to pack his knives and go.
In his final interview, he does that passive-aggressive thing where he accepts his elimination because he was "unwilling to compromise on ingredients". It's like the "I'm sorry if what I said offended you," kind of apology. You heard it from him, first. He's just too noble to succeed in this sordid competition. Ugh. He certainly was a strong contender for a while. I thought he and Nina would be facing off at the end. But it seems Justin is a fierce competitor only when he's assured of his own success. Once he started to struggle, he was all but ready to take his ball and go home. I wouldn't be surprised to see him do well in Last Chance Kitchen, so perhaps this won't be the last we see of him. If it is, though, I think we've made some history here. This may be the first Top Chef season ever where I don't dislike anyone in the top seven. Sure, I have a couple favorites, but as we stand now, I'd be relatively happy to see any of these people win. It's a Christmas miracle!
Overall Grade: B
Sunday, December 29, 2013
Wednesday, December 18, 2013
Home Cooking
Top Chef - Season 11, Episode 10
Previously on Top Chef: Two restaurants went to war. It seemed that the Green team would be the conquering army, but the scrappy Purple team indulged in some sneaky tactical attacks, such as cooking good food and providing capable service. Uncanny! Justin's huffy sneer every time he receives criticism made another unwelcome return, but it seems to be working for him, as Sara's terrible dessert and abysmal service earned her a one-way ticket back to the WWII thrift store. Nine chefs remain. Who will be eliminated tonight?
Quickfire. Guest judge Hubert Keller joins Padma to explain that for this week's challenge, the chefs will be creating dishes centered around coffee. And not just any coffee, but [brand-of-coffee]! Wow, [brand-of-coffee] is awesome! Oh, did you want me to fill in those brackets? Sure thing. As soon as I receive the same $10,000 check that the chef who wins the challenge gets, I'll get right on that. Now, I'm a big coffee enthusiast, but apparently nothing like Nina, who tells us that she drinks 15 espressos a day. As she is not currently hovering around the ceiling like a hummingbird, I do not believe her. Immunity is up for grabs, but the chefs are lot more interested in the money. A couple of interviews make plain that our economy is still a troubled one, because the grand dreams the chefs have for their prize money includes presentable clothes to replace their threadbare duds, and an air conditioner that actually functions.
The chefs spring into action. A lot of their plans go awry, as Brian attempts risotto that turns into a goopy mess, and Carrie runs out of time before her crepes can be cooked. She hurries to make a coffee custard, instead. Shirley crusts some tenderloin with coffee, and makes a coffee brown butter sauce and blanched garlic to go with it. Sounds good. Stephanie combines goat cheese with sweet potato, and serves it on a crepe with a ham/bacon/coffee jam. When it comes to the judging, Hubert singles out these latter three women for praise, while Brian's risotto sinks him to the bottom, along with Nicholas, whose hazelnut coffee caramel emulsion had an unpleasant texture. The winner of immunity and the generous [brand-of-coffee] cash prize is...Shirley! Yay! I have such a soft spot for her. Especially now that she'll have an air conditioner and won't be walking around the house all sweaty and gross.
Elimination Challenge. Another guest judge joins the panel this week. Actor Anthony Mackie has come home to New Orleans, and tells the chefs that for this week's challenge, they'll be going home as well, in a sense. They're tasked with creating a dish inspired by what they want to eat when they're at home. It's an endeavor that has a lot of emotion built in, which is naturally done on purpose, but is also pretty cool to watch. The last time the show did a challenge like this, they couldn't even bring themselves to eliminate anyone, which I found a big relief. Will they be able to go through with it this time? Let's find out! The chefs have a pretty scant three hours' cooking time, and will be presenting their dishes to the judges and guest diner Leah Chase at her New Orleans institution, Dooky Chase. Tradition or no, that is possibly the worst restaurant name I've ever heard - even if it was a name coined in an era before it started sounding like a poop-themed video game.
Shopping/Prep. Justin tells us that he used to eat squirrel, and while my initial reaction is disgust, I have to remind myself of my try-everything-once rule. You know, within reason. I can't turn my nose up at squirrel before joyfully wandering off to eat sweetbreads. Nicholas is making his daughter's favorite gnocchi, and while it's all very cute, it really cements this season's subtitle. "Top Chef - Season 11: Enough With The Goddamn Gnocchi, Already". Shirley shakes the prep table while kneading bread, and loudly hacks up her pork with a cleaver, momentarily getting on everyone else's nerves. Never mind them, girl! You hack to your heart's content. Brian plans to grill some Korean-style steak, while Travis makes biscuits and gravy. Tom raises his eyebrows when he hears the biscuits won't be made with buttermilk. Oh, please. Buttermilk is delicious, but it's not integral to the quality of a biscuit. Especially one smothered in gravy. Stephanie peers deep into my psyche yet again, and comes up with a mussel dish with pickled peppers that I would punch a nun to get at. Upon arrival at Dooky Chase (snicker), Brian discovers there is no charcoal grill, forcing him to pan sear his steaks. Travis keeps opening the oven to gauge the progress of his biscuits. I would never pretend to be a better cook than any contestant ever on this show, but even I know that you shouldn't do that. Yet another reminder that chefs and bakers rarely intersect. Carrie manages to poach a dozen eggs at the same time, which is the most impressive thing I've seen since the Olympics. I tried to do two the other night, and ruined both of them.
The meal goes out in three rounds. In the first round, Brian's marinated steaks go out with Travis' biscuits and Carlos' delightful-looking cochinita pibil with black beans and pico de gallo. The jam Travis serves with his dish is popular, but the inside of his biscuits are underdone to the point of raw. Yikes. Brian's steaks would have been a lot better if he had grilled them. I guess it's a fair criticism, but I can't help but feel for Brian, since he had a reasonable expectation of kitchen equipment that he wasn't able to use. Carlos' dish is praised from top to bottom. Yeah, that looked terrific.
Round 2 includes Nicholas' gnocchi, which looks pretty homey and comforting. He finds himself missing his family, and starts to weep in his interview. Shirley has used her immunity to take a risk, and presents some dao xiao mian she's not entirely sure will be successful. Stephanie has her aforementioned mussel dish, and I'm hungry just typing about it. The judges find Nicholas' gnocchi soft and delightful. Stephanie's dish is also well-received, while Shirley's is met with more confusion than criticism. Round 3 wraps up the meal, with Justin's chicken thigh gravy served over rice, Carrie's creamed asparagus and egg on toast, and Nina's curried chicken. All of those sound good, though I'd have to think Carrie's dish would be viewed as too simple. The judges apparently have no big problem with it, nor with Nina's chicken, though a couple of judges wish she had served it with rice instead of avocado. Justin's recent slide continues, as his chicken has good flavor, but is too dry. Hasn't dryness been the main complaint about every one of his dishes? He should just start slathering everything in sauce, whether it calls for it or not.
Fret 'n sweat. It's pretty tough to tell which way the wind is blowing, as the judges praise Shirley's noodles (but not the overall dish), Nicholas' gnocchi (but not the overall dish), and Travis' gravy (but not the overall dish). They're less reserved about Stephanie and Carlos, whom they all loved. Carlos, Stephanie, and Nicholas are called to Judges' Table as the top three, much to their relief. Nicholas kids that if he got heat for a dish he poured so much emotion into and that he's made a million times, he was going to wreck up the place. Fortunately, no violence is necessary, as he wins his second Elimination Challenge in a row. That dish really did look wonderful. Brian, Justin, and Travis are called in as the bottom three. Brian's steaks may have had more flavor if he had had access to the charcoal grill he wanted, but fact is, he didn't. Travis' undercooked biscuits are a major sticking point. Literally! *rimshot* Justin insists that he's made his dish a bunch of times, just not recently, because he's a restaurant chef and has to cook the actual menu, [assholes]. That [assholes] is not said out loud, but it hangs heavily in the air. Elimination. Oh, yes. Elimination. None of this you-cooked-your-hearts-out-so-everyone-stays this time. Travis. Please pack your knives and go. No huge surprise, there. It'd be impossible to overlook raw dough; there are few things more off-putting to bite into. He cries a bit as he leaves, but seems to be at peace with the decision. No word on whether he's at peace with facing the conservative father he just came out to on national television when he gets home, though.
Overall Grade: B+
Previously on Top Chef: Two restaurants went to war. It seemed that the Green team would be the conquering army, but the scrappy Purple team indulged in some sneaky tactical attacks, such as cooking good food and providing capable service. Uncanny! Justin's huffy sneer every time he receives criticism made another unwelcome return, but it seems to be working for him, as Sara's terrible dessert and abysmal service earned her a one-way ticket back to the WWII thrift store. Nine chefs remain. Who will be eliminated tonight?
Quickfire. Guest judge Hubert Keller joins Padma to explain that for this week's challenge, the chefs will be creating dishes centered around coffee. And not just any coffee, but [brand-of-coffee]! Wow, [brand-of-coffee] is awesome! Oh, did you want me to fill in those brackets? Sure thing. As soon as I receive the same $10,000 check that the chef who wins the challenge gets, I'll get right on that. Now, I'm a big coffee enthusiast, but apparently nothing like Nina, who tells us that she drinks 15 espressos a day. As she is not currently hovering around the ceiling like a hummingbird, I do not believe her. Immunity is up for grabs, but the chefs are lot more interested in the money. A couple of interviews make plain that our economy is still a troubled one, because the grand dreams the chefs have for their prize money includes presentable clothes to replace their threadbare duds, and an air conditioner that actually functions.
The chefs spring into action. A lot of their plans go awry, as Brian attempts risotto that turns into a goopy mess, and Carrie runs out of time before her crepes can be cooked. She hurries to make a coffee custard, instead. Shirley crusts some tenderloin with coffee, and makes a coffee brown butter sauce and blanched garlic to go with it. Sounds good. Stephanie combines goat cheese with sweet potato, and serves it on a crepe with a ham/bacon/coffee jam. When it comes to the judging, Hubert singles out these latter three women for praise, while Brian's risotto sinks him to the bottom, along with Nicholas, whose hazelnut coffee caramel emulsion had an unpleasant texture. The winner of immunity and the generous [brand-of-coffee] cash prize is...Shirley! Yay! I have such a soft spot for her. Especially now that she'll have an air conditioner and won't be walking around the house all sweaty and gross.
Elimination Challenge. Another guest judge joins the panel this week. Actor Anthony Mackie has come home to New Orleans, and tells the chefs that for this week's challenge, they'll be going home as well, in a sense. They're tasked with creating a dish inspired by what they want to eat when they're at home. It's an endeavor that has a lot of emotion built in, which is naturally done on purpose, but is also pretty cool to watch. The last time the show did a challenge like this, they couldn't even bring themselves to eliminate anyone, which I found a big relief. Will they be able to go through with it this time? Let's find out! The chefs have a pretty scant three hours' cooking time, and will be presenting their dishes to the judges and guest diner Leah Chase at her New Orleans institution, Dooky Chase. Tradition or no, that is possibly the worst restaurant name I've ever heard - even if it was a name coined in an era before it started sounding like a poop-themed video game.
Shopping/Prep. Justin tells us that he used to eat squirrel, and while my initial reaction is disgust, I have to remind myself of my try-everything-once rule. You know, within reason. I can't turn my nose up at squirrel before joyfully wandering off to eat sweetbreads. Nicholas is making his daughter's favorite gnocchi, and while it's all very cute, it really cements this season's subtitle. "Top Chef - Season 11: Enough With The Goddamn Gnocchi, Already". Shirley shakes the prep table while kneading bread, and loudly hacks up her pork with a cleaver, momentarily getting on everyone else's nerves. Never mind them, girl! You hack to your heart's content. Brian plans to grill some Korean-style steak, while Travis makes biscuits and gravy. Tom raises his eyebrows when he hears the biscuits won't be made with buttermilk. Oh, please. Buttermilk is delicious, but it's not integral to the quality of a biscuit. Especially one smothered in gravy. Stephanie peers deep into my psyche yet again, and comes up with a mussel dish with pickled peppers that I would punch a nun to get at. Upon arrival at Dooky Chase (snicker), Brian discovers there is no charcoal grill, forcing him to pan sear his steaks. Travis keeps opening the oven to gauge the progress of his biscuits. I would never pretend to be a better cook than any contestant ever on this show, but even I know that you shouldn't do that. Yet another reminder that chefs and bakers rarely intersect. Carrie manages to poach a dozen eggs at the same time, which is the most impressive thing I've seen since the Olympics. I tried to do two the other night, and ruined both of them.
The meal goes out in three rounds. In the first round, Brian's marinated steaks go out with Travis' biscuits and Carlos' delightful-looking cochinita pibil with black beans and pico de gallo. The jam Travis serves with his dish is popular, but the inside of his biscuits are underdone to the point of raw. Yikes. Brian's steaks would have been a lot better if he had grilled them. I guess it's a fair criticism, but I can't help but feel for Brian, since he had a reasonable expectation of kitchen equipment that he wasn't able to use. Carlos' dish is praised from top to bottom. Yeah, that looked terrific.
Round 2 includes Nicholas' gnocchi, which looks pretty homey and comforting. He finds himself missing his family, and starts to weep in his interview. Shirley has used her immunity to take a risk, and presents some dao xiao mian she's not entirely sure will be successful. Stephanie has her aforementioned mussel dish, and I'm hungry just typing about it. The judges find Nicholas' gnocchi soft and delightful. Stephanie's dish is also well-received, while Shirley's is met with more confusion than criticism. Round 3 wraps up the meal, with Justin's chicken thigh gravy served over rice, Carrie's creamed asparagus and egg on toast, and Nina's curried chicken. All of those sound good, though I'd have to think Carrie's dish would be viewed as too simple. The judges apparently have no big problem with it, nor with Nina's chicken, though a couple of judges wish she had served it with rice instead of avocado. Justin's recent slide continues, as his chicken has good flavor, but is too dry. Hasn't dryness been the main complaint about every one of his dishes? He should just start slathering everything in sauce, whether it calls for it or not.
Fret 'n sweat. It's pretty tough to tell which way the wind is blowing, as the judges praise Shirley's noodles (but not the overall dish), Nicholas' gnocchi (but not the overall dish), and Travis' gravy (but not the overall dish). They're less reserved about Stephanie and Carlos, whom they all loved. Carlos, Stephanie, and Nicholas are called to Judges' Table as the top three, much to their relief. Nicholas kids that if he got heat for a dish he poured so much emotion into and that he's made a million times, he was going to wreck up the place. Fortunately, no violence is necessary, as he wins his second Elimination Challenge in a row. That dish really did look wonderful. Brian, Justin, and Travis are called in as the bottom three. Brian's steaks may have had more flavor if he had had access to the charcoal grill he wanted, but fact is, he didn't. Travis' undercooked biscuits are a major sticking point. Literally! *rimshot* Justin insists that he's made his dish a bunch of times, just not recently, because he's a restaurant chef and has to cook the actual menu, [assholes]. That [assholes] is not said out loud, but it hangs heavily in the air. Elimination. Oh, yes. Elimination. None of this you-cooked-your-hearts-out-so-everyone-stays this time. Travis. Please pack your knives and go. No huge surprise, there. It'd be impossible to overlook raw dough; there are few things more off-putting to bite into. He cries a bit as he leaves, but seems to be at peace with the decision. No word on whether he's at peace with facing the conservative father he just came out to on national television when he gets home, though.
Overall Grade: B+
Wednesday, December 11, 2013
Rosie the Sniveler
Top Chef - Season 11, Episode 9
Previously on Top Chef: The chefs attempted to dislodge the marbles in Dr. John's mouth with some custom hot sauce. Brian was on fire (in the good way), and snagged immunity for the boucherie Elimination Challenge. During that hog prep, Justin's meat was on fire (in the bad way), and his day wasn't helped by Nina telling him that he should suck a different kind of sausage. He groused about going to Losers' table for his tacos, while Carlos' tacos won the day. Stephanie avoided being eaten by a gator, but Louis could not avoid the elimination chop. Ten chefs remain. Who will be eliminated tonight?
There is no Quickfire tonight, and while there's a perfectly valid reason for that, am I right in thinking that a lot of Quickfires have gone missing this season? We've gone straight to the Elimination Challenge in a full third of the episodes so far. Odd. I wonder what the deal is, there. Anyhow, Padma explains to the chefs that there is no Quickfire, and they easily guess that it's time for...Restaurant Wars! Also known as...The Challenge That Everyone Except Me Breathlessly Awaits! Not that I hate it or anything, but I get way more excited for challenges like the mise en place relay race. Here's a few reasons why I'm bemused by Restaurant Wars' popularity, and also a humbling reminder that my predictive powers are not always firing on all cylinders. The chefs pull knives to determine their teams, and they wind up being:
Green Team: Sara, Nina, Carlos, Shirley, and Justin
Purple Team: Stephanie, Nicholas, Carrie, Travis, and Brian
Oof. Even a casual glance should tell you that based on challenge wins, we're looking at a severe imbalance here. Of the eight elimination challenges so far, members of the Green team have won six of them (Purple has scored three - the math being weird because Travis and Carlos shared a win). Normally, that might suggest a massacre on the scale of Season 4 is about to take place, but this time, I'm not so sure. First of all, the talent level this year seems to be more equitable. Sure, Nina is a force to be reckoned with, but we've seen plenty of good things out of Carrie and Stephanie, too. Also, and how to put this delicately? This season has been remarkably convivial, with everyone except Michael pretty much getting along and respecting each other. The people that have shown flashes of pissiness, however, are all on the Green team. Challenge wins aside, if an ego clash is coming, it's pretty clearly going to be in the Green kitchen. So maybe this will be more of an even match than we'd initially guess. Let's find out!
As usual, the chefs will have one day to put everything together. The teams go into huddles to discuss strategy. It's always interesting to see how people handle the decision over who should take front-of-house duties. Normally, it's taken on reluctantly by someone who doesn't really want to do it (or in Spike's case, taken on in order to avoid responsibility). This season, however, both Sara and Travis volunteer, and both appear to have genuine aspirations of doing a good job. That dispensed with, the Purple team decides they will be doing a seafood-based menu, and that Nicholas will act as head chef. The Green team head chef duties fall to Justin, and the team decides on a "Modern American" menu, which as we all know by now, means "cook whatever the hell you want". Carlos grouses that the team is more interested in talking about decor than in planning a menu, and yeah, that's ridiculous, "Modern American" or not. I'm kind of gobsmacked that these people think matching plates and tablecloths is more important than talking about what they're going to cook. They don't even have it settled by the time they go shopping. That is so dumb.
The restaurant space will be split into two rooms, and for the first time, there aren't even kitchens. They have to set up temporary cooking implements behind a curtain, which is...odd. Lack of a cohesive menu starts to bite the Green team in the ass, like, DUUUUUUUUUUUH. Sara takes her Rosie the Riveter look into a "We Can Do It!" attitude, except her version of it is passive-aggressively suggesting that they all discuss things in a calm, rational manner before running away so nobody can respond. As cooking prep gets started, the cracks widen. Justin snipes at the other Green team members, and Nina snipes right back. The biggest problem the Purple team is facing right now is that Brian bought xanthan gum instead of agar agar, so his corn gel is going to be stiffer than Tracy Turnblad's hair.
Prep ends, and service begins. It immediately becomes apparent that there is, indeed, a blowout in progress. It's just not the one they initially thought it was going to be. Everything is humming along nicely at "Fin", the Purple team's restaurant. Travis is handling his front-of-house duties with aplomb, and their menu is balanced and gets a lot of appreciative compliments. Stephanie's linguini with caviar, oyster cream, and fennel looks incredible in particular, though I'd replace the fennel with something else. I'm getting a little sick of it. Over at the Green team's restaurant (feel free to snicker over them naming it "Found" - the judges and I certainly did), they may as well have literal headless chickens running around. Sara's service is wretched, and the kitchen keeps fucking up tickets so that only half a table's orders are going out. In the funniest bit, Sara dumps food in front of the judges with a tight rictus grin, and walks away without bothering to explain a word about what's being served. The dishes aren't terribly successful, either. Justin's rabbit dish is dry and Sara's nectarine brown-butter cake is described as a greasy cookie. Shirley's olive-oil poached cobia looks good, though, and Nina makes a pork dish that garners her usual praise.
Fret 'n sweat. We've seen both teams in action and have an edited encapsulation to understand how lopsided this challenge turned out to be, but the chefs have no such clarity, so everyone is anxious. When Padma calls the Purple team in to Judges' Table, they have no idea how they did. Their relief at being told they are winning team is so palpable it leaks out of James' TV. Brian's corn gel wasn't great, and Carrie's shrimp dish was a bit greasy, but that's about it for complaints. Travis' service was far and away the best in any Restaurant Wars to date, and Nicholas not only steered his team well, but made a delightful black drum and oxtail dish as well. That's enough to bring him the win, and he's overjoyed to finally have one under his belt. Losers' Table. We don't even need to bother with Nina, Carlos, or Shirley, because it's obvious that they're safe. This decision all comes down to terrible food and terrible management, both in the kitchen and in the dining room.
Justin is once again huffy at any criticism leveled against him, be it fair or unfair. Sara is once again compliant and apologetic on the surface, but with an obvious sneer underneath. Justin had no leadership skills and his rabbit dish was disappointing. Sara's service was appalling, and her cake was terrible. Even if Justin didn't strike me as a more likely overall contender (and thus, a more attractive prospect for the producers to keep), at least a portion of his problems can be blamed on the chaos that Sara's inept dining room management caused. So it's not too much of a surprise when Sara is told to pack her knives and go. She attempts to be stoic and placid, but is not great at masking her feelings about how shitty she thinks this elimination was. Eh. Seemed fair to me.
Overall Grade: B-
Previously on Top Chef: The chefs attempted to dislodge the marbles in Dr. John's mouth with some custom hot sauce. Brian was on fire (in the good way), and snagged immunity for the boucherie Elimination Challenge. During that hog prep, Justin's meat was on fire (in the bad way), and his day wasn't helped by Nina telling him that he should suck a different kind of sausage. He groused about going to Losers' table for his tacos, while Carlos' tacos won the day. Stephanie avoided being eaten by a gator, but Louis could not avoid the elimination chop. Ten chefs remain. Who will be eliminated tonight?
There is no Quickfire tonight, and while there's a perfectly valid reason for that, am I right in thinking that a lot of Quickfires have gone missing this season? We've gone straight to the Elimination Challenge in a full third of the episodes so far. Odd. I wonder what the deal is, there. Anyhow, Padma explains to the chefs that there is no Quickfire, and they easily guess that it's time for...Restaurant Wars! Also known as...The Challenge That Everyone Except Me Breathlessly Awaits! Not that I hate it or anything, but I get way more excited for challenges like the mise en place relay race. Here's a few reasons why I'm bemused by Restaurant Wars' popularity, and also a humbling reminder that my predictive powers are not always firing on all cylinders. The chefs pull knives to determine their teams, and they wind up being:
Green Team: Sara, Nina, Carlos, Shirley, and Justin
Purple Team: Stephanie, Nicholas, Carrie, Travis, and Brian
Oof. Even a casual glance should tell you that based on challenge wins, we're looking at a severe imbalance here. Of the eight elimination challenges so far, members of the Green team have won six of them (Purple has scored three - the math being weird because Travis and Carlos shared a win). Normally, that might suggest a massacre on the scale of Season 4 is about to take place, but this time, I'm not so sure. First of all, the talent level this year seems to be more equitable. Sure, Nina is a force to be reckoned with, but we've seen plenty of good things out of Carrie and Stephanie, too. Also, and how to put this delicately? This season has been remarkably convivial, with everyone except Michael pretty much getting along and respecting each other. The people that have shown flashes of pissiness, however, are all on the Green team. Challenge wins aside, if an ego clash is coming, it's pretty clearly going to be in the Green kitchen. So maybe this will be more of an even match than we'd initially guess. Let's find out!
As usual, the chefs will have one day to put everything together. The teams go into huddles to discuss strategy. It's always interesting to see how people handle the decision over who should take front-of-house duties. Normally, it's taken on reluctantly by someone who doesn't really want to do it (or in Spike's case, taken on in order to avoid responsibility). This season, however, both Sara and Travis volunteer, and both appear to have genuine aspirations of doing a good job. That dispensed with, the Purple team decides they will be doing a seafood-based menu, and that Nicholas will act as head chef. The Green team head chef duties fall to Justin, and the team decides on a "Modern American" menu, which as we all know by now, means "cook whatever the hell you want". Carlos grouses that the team is more interested in talking about decor than in planning a menu, and yeah, that's ridiculous, "Modern American" or not. I'm kind of gobsmacked that these people think matching plates and tablecloths is more important than talking about what they're going to cook. They don't even have it settled by the time they go shopping. That is so dumb.
The restaurant space will be split into two rooms, and for the first time, there aren't even kitchens. They have to set up temporary cooking implements behind a curtain, which is...odd. Lack of a cohesive menu starts to bite the Green team in the ass, like, DUUUUUUUUUUUH. Sara takes her Rosie the Riveter look into a "We Can Do It!" attitude, except her version of it is passive-aggressively suggesting that they all discuss things in a calm, rational manner before running away so nobody can respond. As cooking prep gets started, the cracks widen. Justin snipes at the other Green team members, and Nina snipes right back. The biggest problem the Purple team is facing right now is that Brian bought xanthan gum instead of agar agar, so his corn gel is going to be stiffer than Tracy Turnblad's hair.
Prep ends, and service begins. It immediately becomes apparent that there is, indeed, a blowout in progress. It's just not the one they initially thought it was going to be. Everything is humming along nicely at "Fin", the Purple team's restaurant. Travis is handling his front-of-house duties with aplomb, and their menu is balanced and gets a lot of appreciative compliments. Stephanie's linguini with caviar, oyster cream, and fennel looks incredible in particular, though I'd replace the fennel with something else. I'm getting a little sick of it. Over at the Green team's restaurant (feel free to snicker over them naming it "Found" - the judges and I certainly did), they may as well have literal headless chickens running around. Sara's service is wretched, and the kitchen keeps fucking up tickets so that only half a table's orders are going out. In the funniest bit, Sara dumps food in front of the judges with a tight rictus grin, and walks away without bothering to explain a word about what's being served. The dishes aren't terribly successful, either. Justin's rabbit dish is dry and Sara's nectarine brown-butter cake is described as a greasy cookie. Shirley's olive-oil poached cobia looks good, though, and Nina makes a pork dish that garners her usual praise.
Fret 'n sweat. We've seen both teams in action and have an edited encapsulation to understand how lopsided this challenge turned out to be, but the chefs have no such clarity, so everyone is anxious. When Padma calls the Purple team in to Judges' Table, they have no idea how they did. Their relief at being told they are winning team is so palpable it leaks out of James' TV. Brian's corn gel wasn't great, and Carrie's shrimp dish was a bit greasy, but that's about it for complaints. Travis' service was far and away the best in any Restaurant Wars to date, and Nicholas not only steered his team well, but made a delightful black drum and oxtail dish as well. That's enough to bring him the win, and he's overjoyed to finally have one under his belt. Losers' Table. We don't even need to bother with Nina, Carlos, or Shirley, because it's obvious that they're safe. This decision all comes down to terrible food and terrible management, both in the kitchen and in the dining room.
Justin is once again huffy at any criticism leveled against him, be it fair or unfair. Sara is once again compliant and apologetic on the surface, but with an obvious sneer underneath. Justin had no leadership skills and his rabbit dish was disappointing. Sara's service was appalling, and her cake was terrible. Even if Justin didn't strike me as a more likely overall contender (and thus, a more attractive prospect for the producers to keep), at least a portion of his problems can be blamed on the chaos that Sara's inept dining room management caused. So it's not too much of a surprise when Sara is told to pack her knives and go. She attempts to be stoic and placid, but is not great at masking her feelings about how shitty she thinks this elimination was. Eh. Seemed fair to me.
Overall Grade: B-
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