Couture de France

Project Runway - Season 3, Episode 9

Previously on Project Runway: The designers were told to create an outfit for a hip-happenin' jetsetter -- themselves. Angela squealed happily, despite not knowing the first thing about how to approach the challenge. Everyone whipped their clothes together, then were whisked off to Paris. Catherine Malandrino popped in as a "host judge", and her first duty was to boot Angela right back to the states. Six designers remain. Who will be out tonight?

Opening credits. Jeez, check out Katie's outfit in the lineup. I realize simple, black dresses probably aren't her style, but man. If she can't even dress herself, it's no wonder she was punted early.

Paris! Either the color is washed out on purpose, or my TV sucks more than I thought, because the flag looks green, white, and red. Music almost directly stolen from the Amelie soundtrack brings us back to Parsons Paris. Tim gathers the designers in the workroom, and this must have been shot immediately after Angela left, because everyone's still wearing their jetsetting outfits. Tim informs Jeffrey that he has immunity for this challenge, and while I hate him, at least I don't have to spend the next hour hoping against hope that this'll be the week. Tim asks Catherine to introduce the next challenge. It will be to create a "couture" gown, which Tim will now attempt to explain. True couture designers have to be licensed, so the designers will only be implementing certain facets of couture. Emphasis is placed on very personal elements, such as hand-sewn hems, embroidery, and beading. I'm still confused. If the only difference between couture and non-couture is that someone sewed some intricate beading on, why is it taken so seriously, to the point that you need a governmental license? I'm not criticizing couture; I genuinely don't understand what sets it apart from other high-fashion gowns. Catherine tells everyone that they have two days to put their gowns together, which elicits the standard "Wah, that's not much time" response from the designers. The gowns will be presented at a party that Catherine will throw. After she leaves, Tim tells everyone that they can get settled in the hotel, and then he's taking them out to dinner. This is the first welcome announcement that the designers have heard in a while.

Hotel Lutetia. Kayne lists off his roommates one by one. He could have just said that he's in a room with all the other guys, but I suppose then he wouldn't be listening to himself for as long. He loves the view from their room, which is on the top floor. Laura's still getting adjusted to the fact that she's in France. Uli is happy to be back "home" in Europe. Jeffrey eats a kiwi like a monkey. I'm not just saying that to make fun of him. Seriously. He literally eats it like a chimpanzee would. The editors insert a clip of him being glad that Angela's gone that's clearly out of sequence, just to make him look like more of a dick. You don't need to do that, guys. He doesn't need the help. Tim comes in and admires the rooms. Everyone leaves for dinner. Michael interviews that he's very inspired by the city, as we see beautiful shots of everyone walking through Paris, admiring the pyramid in the courtyard of the Louvre and such. Laura voices-over that everyone walked to a French restaurant. No offense, Laura, but duuuuuuuuuuuuuuh. She's happy to have a little time to relax. Kayne toasts Jeffrey's first win. Aw, that's sweet. Night falls.

Morning. I have got to believe that they're washing the color out of these shots on purpose. God knows why, because it just makes the city look smoggy. Laura interviews that she's more worried about elimination now, because she seems to feel that all the weak links are gone. She's either very kind for ignoring the fact that Vincent's still here, or she's not fully awake yet. Tim shows up at the hotel room to find the guys sketching ideas for their gowns. He tells that they'll have more time to do that later, and takes everyone to the subway, where a man who's probably curious about the camera crew chats up Jeffrey. They take a long staircase up, which has got to be killing poor, pregnant Laura, and Jeffrey interviews that he's feeling very inspired by the city. Tim drops them off in a picturesque spot to draw for another half an hour. Michael interviews that he doesn't want to do anything too edgy or avant-garde, because he hasn't done this type of work before. But I thought being edgy was part of the whole couture thing? Nevermind. I'm not even going to pretend that I know what I'm talking about with this challenge. You'll never guess what effect couture gowns have on Vincent. That's right, it turns him on! That'd be the fourth reference to his sexual stimulation from clothing on this show. If he gets this much of a charge out of clothes, his poor wife must never be allowed to get undressed. How did she ever conceive a child? Everyone wraps up their drawings, and Tim gathers them to go shopping.

Fabric store. One hour to shop, and 300 Euros (that's about $375). Go! Laura's a little flustered, because she's so used to shopping at Mood. Uli wants to stick with a pattern she's comfortable with, but can add more to later. Jeffrey picks up a beautiful yellow plaid. He says that his inspiration is the Statue of Liberty. I'm so glad he spent all that time telling us how inspirational he finds Europe, only to pick an American landmark as his basis. He also interviews that he wants to be the first designer to win a challenge while having immunity. As a self-made goal, he could do worse, but he's making it sound like it'd be somehow more impressive than Michael's back-to-back win, which is isn't.

Workroom. Eight hours left. The designers have been assigned European models, because there's no way Bravo was going to fly all of our usual models out to Paris to hang out for three hours. Tim tells them that the gowns will need to be refitted for the models in New York. He gives them until midnight, then takes his leave with an awkwardly-placed "Make it work" in French. I wonder if he feels silly having to spout that catchphrase over and over. Uli interviews that there wasn't much time to figure out what to do, so she immediately began draping. She says that she's not using any crazy prints or colors this time, obviously taking last week's criticisms to heart. Laura wants to take a basic black dress with white collar and cuffs and "vamp it up". Michael wants to keep the basic silhouette of his dress very simple so that he'll have time for all the hand-sewing he's going to do. Kayne says that he's going to love his dress when he's through; that he'd put it on his best pageant girl. Laura tries to gently head him off at the pass by saying that if a he's designing to dress a pageant girl, he's in for some trouble. He says that it won't look overly pageanty at all, but Laura's unconvinced, interviewing that Kayne has a Vegas vibe that is already starting to show in this week's garment. Jeffrey interviews that it looks like more of a prom gown than a couture gown. Kayne hopes that it'll fit the model. Laura pulls a face.

One hour left. Vincent has stripped down to a wifebeater and shorts for apparently no reason. I guess he was overtaken by arousal from being surrounded by clothing and had to jerk off right there in the workroom. Ew, I grossed myself out. That's rare. He tries to convince us (and likely, himself) that his gown will be very classy and couture. Laura is again unconvinced. She has a completely awesome interview in which she sums up precisely what I think of Vincent. Let me see if I can get it all. "Vincent is, like, a legend in his own mind. He spends a lot of time working on his pattern on the mannequin, stepping back, admiring his work, and asking us other designers over for what he calls 'an opinion', but it's really he just wants us to come admire his work." She's so got him pegged. Kayne obligingly pays Vincent's gown some lip service before escaping back to his own workstation. Thirty minutes left. Laura asks Michael if he can pull off the scalloping he's got going. He says he'll damn sure try. Time winds down. Off to bed.

Day Two. Michael and Jeffrey are up, but Vincent's still in bed. Jeffrey turns on one of those loud electric shavers, and Vincent yells from beneath the covers that he's sleeping, and what's wrong with Jeffrey? I don't believe I have enough bandwidth to cover what's wrong with Jeffrey, but it looks like it's time to get up, Vincent. I can't be too hard on him. I'm impossible to get out of bed, too. Vincent calls Jeffrey a fuck, while Jeffrey stands on the balcony, shaving and looking mildly disturbed. That was funny.

Workroom. Twelve hours left. Everyone gets started, and Tim comes in to check on their progress. Michael has taped his model's headshot to the mannequin's neck. Hehehe. He's got his basic dress done, but still needs to incorporate all of the detail. He's worried about time, as is Tim, judging from his wrinkled forehead. Laura... Holy hell, what is Laura wearing? She's got a collared white shirt on, with the collar sticking straight up. The bottom of the shirt is tied into a knot that's resting on her pregnant belly. The only thing she's missing is a banjo and a jug with three X's on it. Tim confirms that she's done with the dress, and can focus on the collar, which is where all of the design element rests. Tim wants to know how far she's going to take the collar, and she responds that it's her only real shot at making an artistic statement, so I guess pretty far. The first thing Tim says to Kayne about his garment is "I want to say this to you in the spirit of somebody who wants you only to succeed." Rut roh. Tim goes on to say that the dress isn't working for him, mostly because of the visible black boning beneath the gold cloth of the bodice. Yeah, that's tacky. Kayne extrapolates this out to mean that Tim hates the entire outfit, which I don't think is the case. He also interviews that while Tim may hate it, Kayne himself thinks it's gorrrrrrrrrrgeous. Oh, well then I'm sure the judges will love it too. After all, didn't they fall all over themselves to compliment Kayne the last time he ignored Tim's advice? Oh, wait. Twit.

Commercials. You know who I'm really impressed by at parties? People who can't manage to wrangle ice cubes into their glass.

Six hours left. Jeffrey has worked himself up into a cackling fit, comparing the challenge to having two days to make an atom bomb. Laura tells the other designers that she's worried that Kayne (who isn't present) will have "his head handed to him on a ree-deek-coo-lus plate tomorrow". She seems genuinely concerned for him, which is nice. She says that she doesn't want to see him get hurt. "Who cares if he gets hurt?" Jeffrey retorts. "No one will buy that [gown]. Unless it's Halloween." See, editors? No need to splice misleading interview clips together. In the sewing room, Kayne says that he doesn't really have the time to change anything about his design as a response to Tim's criticisms, which is bullshit, but whatever. Laura has a sign on her workbench that reads "CAUTION -- 'FLEURCHAMPS' MAKING IN PROGRESS". Hehehe. Ouch. Poor, tasteless Angela. Vincent hates Laura's dress. He tells Jeffrey that it's horrible. Jeffrey agrees, saying that Laura only knows how to do one style of dress. So Jeffrey pretty much hates everyone's dress but his own. Shocking, I know. I guess I'm not more bothered about it because this week, his criticisms are more apt. Kayne's dress does look tacky and Laura does stick within a narrow design aesthetic.

Night falls. Four hours left. Michael is hand-ruching his fabric, and Vincent interviews that it's very poorly done. I guess Laura and Michael just don't understand how to make high-fashion gowns like Vincent "Basket Hat" Libretti does. Michael is nervous about it, and Jeffrey attacks a chicken leg as he tells him that Michael's given himself a lot of work to do. I think we've filled our quota of shots of Jeffrey eating now, show. Thanks. Jeffrey goes on to say that what Michael's doing is what Malan was attempting to do when he got eliminated, which Michael cautiously takes as a compliment. Vincent stresses over the time crunch. Uli feels pretty good about her garment, saying that you can still tell that it's an "Uli dress", but that it's more of a couture gown. She's constructed some wonderful braiding that is not attached to the dress yet. Jeffrey and Laura have a mini-spat over the hand-made things they've made before, but it doesn't really progress to anything. I have to say I'm relieved. It's nice to get back to an episode that's more about the clothes and the challenge than it is about how much a designer's attitude sucks. Work montage. Midnight hits, and everyone heads for the hotel. Cool little electronic gates open for the designers to board the subway, and Uli makes a face like she's scared one of them is about to take her arm off. Laura interviews that everyone's exhausted, but especially her, due to the pregnancy. I can certainly buy it. She's one of the most put-together people I've ever seen on television, and she looks like death warmed over right about now. Back at the hotel, Laura heads to bed while the others stay up for a drink and to rehash the challenge. Kayne once again disdains Tim's advice.

Morning. The designers are all dressed and ready to go except for Kayne. There's a shot of him shaving, and... Slow down, Kayne! Man, if I shaved with quick little downward strokes like that, it'd take me three hours. He interviews that everyone's very focused on the challenge. After more washed-out shots of Paris, we're back at the workroom. There are three hours until the party. Uli interviews that Vincent's dress is not finished, and that his fabric choice reminds her of a sofa. She's right. I think my grandmother had some chairs upholstered in a very similar pattern. Michael is still nervous about never having fully hand-sewn a garment before. Tim pops in to tell them he's sending in the models, and that they have two and a half hours to get fully ready. Laura wants to know if they'll be having a traditional runway walk, but Tim won't spill the beans.

Various European models whose names I'm not bothering to learn stream in. The designers begin the fitting. Tim asks Vincent what he's doing. He's still got to sew the bottom hem. Tim asks him if he's got time to hand-sew the hem, and Vincent is confident that he can. Michael's model is smaller than he expected, so he has to take the dress in four sizes. Yipes. Laura tells her model that she's going to be warm in her wool dress. Her model doesn't seem to care. Kayne fits his model, and throws out a few more "Gorrrrrgeous!" Laura pulls another face. Vincent is gluing the shit out of his dress. No, really. Again, I don't pretend to know dick about couture gowns, but after all the condescending twaddle he's been throwing towards Laura and Michael this episode, he's slathering glue all over a dress that is supposed to emphasize hand-sewn detail. Not only is he gluing details onto the dress, but he's actually gluing the hem he assured Tim he had time to sew onto the bottom. He has an interview in which he dismissively snots that of course he didn't have time to finish. Making a couture gown in two days is impossible. Well, sure. It's not like there are five other people standing in the room who did just that. Models are still getting dressed when Tim gives the five-minute warning. Michael tells his model that he realizes his dress isn't the best, but he wants her to act as if it's the prettiest gown she's ever seen. Tim announces that it's time to go, and practically has to drag Vincent out with a hook.

Commercials. I know this will bring a mob with torches and pitchforks to my door, but Bob Dylan is an awful singer. A terrific musician, and a gifted songwriter, but an awful, awful singer.

The designers and models stroll down the street. That cannot be comfortable for those poor girls. At least the New York models only have to walk a short distance, and all indoors. Tim grandly presents the party destination: a large boat on the Seine. Neat. As everyone approaches the boat, dark and foreboding music sweeps in. Are these people about to be attacked by sharks? We don't exactly see what happens next, but it appears as if someone on a balcony lobs an egg down on the group. I've freeze-framed it on the culprit, but I can't really figure out an age or gender. Really, it looks like Fat Elvis. What an ass. Who knows why he/she did this, but it may have been racial, since the egg landed splat in front of Michael's model, smattering the bottom of the dress with goo. Aw, that sucks. Michael, already unhappy about how his gown looks, is sunk even lower in despair. He naturally heads straight for the champagne. Catherine greets everyone, and says she's very impressed at first view with what the designers have achieved in two days. They have a toast. Kayne has an interview in which he's drawn a very thin moustache and beard on his face, tilts a beret at a kicky angle, and enthusiastically jabbers in a broad French accent. Heh. I'm glad he's having fun.

The boat takes off for a lovely cruise down the river. Catherine makes the rounds. She tries to read Jeffrey's neck tattoos, and he's thrilled, because he's finally getting the attention that the damn things were put there for. She has his model do a turn, and tells him that it was very daring and audacious to do an evening gown in cotton. Next is Laura. Catherine thinks it's very interesting to do an evening gown that covers the arms. She tells Kayne that it's brave to have such an open lace in the back, but that it fits his model perfectly. She approaches Michael's dress to look at the detail up close, but we never hear her reaction to it. She asks Vincent about his inspiration. He can't come up with anything, so he launches into some of the most poorly-covered ass-kissing I've ever had the embarrassment to witness. "You are one of the most sensational women I've ever laid my eyes on. Everything about you -- your hair, [something, something], your persona..." Jeffrey shakes his head, and even though he's wearing sunglasses, you can feel his eyes rolling. And for one, brief, shining moment? I totally feel you, Jeffrey. Vincent continues on in this vein until he asks Catherine if she feels the dress is too "throwback" or if it's modern. "It's an interesting dress," she says. Huh. Guess that brown-nosing about her "persona" didn't work. Who woulda thunk?

Catherine would like to see the dresses in motion and tells them the models are going to do a walk. Tim explains that Catherine will be scoring the dresses, and that her scores will be added to the New York judging scores. We'll get to the actual outfits then. Walk, walk, walk. Tim collects the scorecards, and with that dispensed with, everyone's free to enjoy the rest of the evening. Ah. We finally see Catherine talk with Uli about her garment, which she calls "light" and "effortless". Catherine was very carefully diplomatic with all the designers. She didn't say that she outright liked or disliked anything. Well played, madam. Kayne compliments the models. More shots of Paris, and everything's beautiful, and everyone's having a wonderful time, and there's romantic music that takes us into the break with an honest-to-goodness closing-circle wipe. I'm surprised they didn't make it heart-shaped.

Commercials. This season's "fan favorite" will win $10,000 at the reunion special. Come on. We all know it's going to be Keith. Snerk.

New York. Welcome back, designers! Hope they didn't confiscate all your deodorant. Laura interviews that she enjoyed the trip, but is anxious to see who's moving on to the next round. Man, Kayne wasn't kidding about people being focused. I really hope everyone didn't walk off the plane and directly into the workroom to get ready for the show, but that's what we see. Although I suppose it would be amusing to see someone fall asleep while Nina's trying to critique them. Tim tells the designers they have two hours to fit their models and get them ready. The models come in. Camilla's adorable when she smiles. Kayne describes the challenge to Amanda, and interviews that he has to make considerable sizing changes from the model in Paris. Marilinda barks. She's a perfect match for Jeffrey. Vincent assures Jia of something as he, you guessed it, glues some more shit to his dress. Laura makes the unpleasant discovery that the collar that was so voluminous and vibrant in Paris is now crushed and wilted. She tries to spruce it up with her hands. Boring hair and makeup montage. Someone has given Camilla an ill-advised wig or weave.

Runway. Heidi comes out and asks if the designers enjoyed their trip to Paris. Michael, always the gentleman, thanks her. Heidi goes on to describe the entire challenge, which takes even longer than usual. Michael Kors and Nina are present, and our guest judge this week is "legendary" fashion designer Richard Tyler. Never heard of him. Not that that means anything, but what does mean something is his greasy, slicked-back mullet, unattractive stubble, and ill-fitting, boring gray blazer. Heidi tells us he's recently designed the Delta flight attendant uniforms, the ugliness of which I specifically noticed. I get the feeling I'm not going to put too much stock in this guy's opinion. Heidi reminds the designers that she said there will be a benefit to winning that will be revealed in a later challenge, which I thought referred to the jetsetter challenge, but I guess not. Let's start the show!

First up is Amanda, in Kayne's dress. Amanda is so, so pretty. The dress looks lovely from afar, although I have no idea how closely it adheres to the whole "couture" thing. The bodice is sleeveless and gold. The skirt is long and flowing, and incorporates gold and copper and brown. The back is fastened with an asymmetrical lace-up. We get a closeup on the dress, and here's the problem. The very black boning that Tim brought up earlier is clearly visible. Bleh. Next up is Camilla, in Laura's dress, and I just want to rip that wig off her head. The outfit looks exponentially less pretty than it did in Paris. It's a basic black dress with a deep lace collar in both the front and back, and the same frilly lace at the cuffs. Laura was unsuccessful in trying to breathe life back into the collar, so it looks flat and dull. She recognizes that she's in trouble on this one. Next is Lindsay, in Uli's dress. It's beautiful. Again, I don't know how close she came to "couture", because it looks very similar to dresses Uli's made before, but I've always liked Uli's work, so I'm happy. The dress is light purple, and there are two crisscrossed braiding straps on the shoulders. These come down to a semi-sheer bodice with some intricate detail sewn in. Then there are more braids at the waist that hang down, along with the flowing purple fabric, to make a fairly straight line. It's beautiful. Nina purses her lips, which worries me.

Next is Marilinda, in Jeffrey's dress. Bad thing first. I don't care for the draping. It's Jeffrey's typical "deconstructed" look, which means that I can't tell where one part of the dress ends and another begins. It just looks random, which I find unattractive. However. Marilinda really sells this outfit. The color is vibrant and pretty. It's the first thing that I've seen from Jeffrey that makes it look like he's trying to make the woman feel attractive, rather than using her as a moving billboard to proclaim how hardcore he is. He's thrilled with Marilinda, voicing-over that she was worlds better at showcasing the dress than the European model, and he's right. Jia, in Vincent's dress. It doesn't look as bad as I thought it would, but it's still not good. I don't know what his deal with shoulders is, but they're always awful. The top of the outfit is shiny gold. The bottom is that sofa-looking fabric that Uli mentioned. There's a fabric rose glued on the back that would do Angela proud. Vincent crazies-over that his outfit has a level of sophistication that the other designers lacked. Yeah, the negative fifty level. Nazri, in Michael's dress. It's my least favorite of his garments to date. I appreciate his efforts in trying something new, but the hand-ruching on his dress looks messy and uneven. The dress itself is a lovely shade of blueish-purple, but looks like it doesn't fit in the chest. The back is nice, though. Michael voices-over that he's sweating like a whore in church, and expects to be in the bottom two.

The designers wait on the runway while the scores are tabulated. Nobody is declared automatically safe. The models come back out. Uli. She describes how she tried to raise her quality level for this challenge by hiding the seams, which are usually very visible. Good answer. Heidi loves that it's toned down. Michael Kors also likes it, but it doesn't appeal as much to Richard. No, it wouldn't, since it doesn't make Lindsay look like she just staggered off the set as an extra in an Elvira movie. Kayne. He explains what he put into the outfit. The judges feel that it's too busy; that he throws too many elements into several of his outfits. I can't disagree, though I think they're being a little too hard on this particular dress. Jeffrey. Nina thinks he made the most creative gown on the runway. Michael Kors approves of the color choice. Richard says that he can tell that Marilinda loves wearing it. I agree, though I don't think that someone's score should be affected by how well the model acts. Shannon willingly strutted down the runway in exploding cupcakes, while made up to look like a deranged mime; doesn't mean it was pretty.

Vincent is asked what he made by hand. He says he used very expensive fabric, and that his outfit is soft and feminine. What that answer has to do with the question is beyond me. I guess we should be glad he's talking about the outfit at all, and not into a full psychotic episode where he thinks he's Mayor McCheese. He does point out some detail in the sleeve. Michael Kors dislikes the sleeve, but knows that's a matter of taste. What isn't is the fact that the sleeves don't fit at all. Nina points out that the dress would make more sense (and fit better) if the front were the back and vice versa. Another good point. Richard hates the rose on the back, and yeah. If there's one thing you want to avoid when your fabric looks like a couch cushion, it's a design element that looks like a couch cushion button cover. Michael. He gets in a preemptive strike about how this was his first time hand-ruching. The judges point out how messy it looks. Michael describes the egg incident, which doesn't really explain the ruching mess, but whatever. Heidi and Richard dislike the fabric that sticks up on the bodice. That's what was making it look so ill-fitted. When Nazri tucks the flaps of fabric in, it looks tons better. Laura's lifeless collar is taken to task. Michael Kors says that Camilla looks like a French maid. The designers are dismissed.

Deliberations. Catherine loved Uli's dress. Heidi likes it, too. Michael Kors appreciates the hand-work that went into it. Catherine gave Jeffrey a high score as well. The judges again bring up Marilinda's energy on the runway, and again, that shouldn't be the point. Catherine thinks Michael's was too heavily-draped. Richard seems to think that Michael should have somehow been prepared for the egg attack. Yep, it's official. Richard Tyler is a moron. Sometimes, you can judge a book by its cover. Catherine wasn't wild about Kayne's, and the judges are getting more and more fed up with his "taste level". Vincent's sucks from top to bottom. Hilariously, Catherine's notes on his dress are "NO... NO. NO. NO." Laura's looked old and uninteresting. The judges come to a decision.

This week's nice thing about someone I don't like: Generally, when I drive to and from Kansas City, half my time is spent yelling at truckers to get out of the left lane. This past weekend, if they got into the left lane at all, they passed quickly and smoothly, then got the hell back over.

Elimination. Tonight, we're going to start with the challenge's winner. It's Jeffrey. Eh. I suppose we can make this into a Choose Your Own Adventure. If you like Jeffrey, read paragraph (A). If you don't, read paragraph (B).

(A) Fair enough, I suppose. I liked Uli's dress more, but there's no denying that she sticks to her familiar design, while Jeffrey takes more risks, which is part of what couture is about. Plus, that fabric choice? Flawless.

(B) Of course Jeffrey won. Uli is quietly competent, always making pretty garments, while keeping the drama to a minimum. How is that any fun? Let's give the win to the villain with questionable taste so that we can justify his ride to the final three. Not that the show has ever let people sail into the finals on controversial personality alone. Wendy who? Santino what?

Heidi announces that starting with this challenge, no further winners will have immunity. I guess there's still that "advantage to winning" that we know nothing about. Jeffrey's happy, and refreshingly non-annoying in his interview. Back on the runway, Uli's in. Michael's in. Kayne's in. That leaves Laura and Vincent in the bottom two. I'm telling you right now, if this is another of those bullshit eliminations where Vincent is spared while someone far more talented gets cut, I will draw blood. I'm not quite sure whose. Vincent's dress lacked finishing and detail, and fit poorly. Laura's was predictable. Laura. Is. In. Oh, thank the heavens. FINALLY. The basket hat didn't do it, and the construction paper dress didn't do it, but we're finally free of Crazy McGee. He sad for "whatever reason he was judged out". Yeah, it was hard to call, Vincent. He's disappointed, but is not sorry he took the chance. Project Runway was a beautiful thing that, you guessed it, gets him off. Vincent? Go away. Far away.

Next week on Project Runway: Heidi introduces two very special guests. Laura cries. Laura! Cries! Perhaps we'll learn the fate of Clarissa, the model who apparently vanished into the ether the moment Angela was eliminated.

Also, I'm sensing some patterns. Here's my official prediction, barring a major fashion disaster: Next week, Kayne. Then Uli. That'll leave Jeffrey, Laura, and Michael to show at Fashion Week. Jeffrey will get third, Laura will get second, and Michael will win.

Overall Grade: B+